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Song Parodies -> "Doomsday Machine Bad News"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Doomsday Machine Bad News"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

In 1983 when US President Ronald Reagan announced his Strategic Defense Initiative (SDI), the USSR took that as a sign that the United States intended a first strike advantage over them. In rapid response a system called Perimeter (formerly known as Dead Hand) was developed by 1985 to counter any such strike and beyond- even if all military commands had been destroyed and communications with aircraft and submarines had been lost. Perimeter works through a vast network of sensors placed around the FSU military defense sites with air samplers, radiation detectors, com line feeders,and seismic impact detectors. A central computer runs from a network and should all of these sensors be taken out in sequence or simultaneously the machine would take over command of all remaining strategic nuclear weapons for a massive counterattack and possibly a global assault. Surviving Russian humanity at that time would be cut out of the military loop entirely. Russia maintains that the system is stable and is incapable of an error that would trigger it due to the complex factors involved to initiate a response. Although the US has no plans for a first strike, in the event of a war with Russia space-based classified systems like ASTRA (for example) would become active and immediately shift the ionosphere over Russia, severing all communications and then fire on Russian sats (commanding US ASATs to do the same), blinding them strategically. Nukes could be fired at Russia from space. Whether this combo would trigger Perimeter is unknown...
Doomsday machine bad news
since ‘85

SDI response- had no clue
Fatal weapon
Sensor detectin’

Reds couldn’t stand it
A First-Strike inbound
Perimeter “dead hand”
Could launch nukes with no one else around

[Network buried deep underground]

Doomsday machine bad news
since ‘85
Risks lives

Still in use
Still in use
Still in use
Puts world in jeopardy
Samples the air
Seismic hits measured
by activity

[com line connect feeds]

It’s deadly
Doomsday machine bad news
since ‘85
(Accident might trigger global tragedy)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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AFW - November 13, 2012 - Report this comment
It's ironic to realize that the same technology bringing civilization so far ahead in the world, may someday cause it's destruction..

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