When I joined this group, we ate at service stations,
Now my Balti gently heats.
We ate all kinds of stuff I wouldn't give to my worst relations.
But now my Balti gently heats.


I don't know how I was converted
My palate hurt and turned blue.
I don't know how they cook in Delhi,
But it fills my belly, it's true.


I went to the East, to learn from The Master.
While my Balti gently heats.
I looked such a fool, when I asked him to cook pasta
While my Balti gently heats.


I try each night, am I too hasty?
My curry tastes like stew.
I don't know why, it never smells like Ravi's
More like Dave Lee Travis' shoe.


I look at my stove and I see that it's steaming,
While my Balti gently heats.
I hope it tastes good, but I know I am dreaming,
Still my Balti gently heee-heee-heeeeeaaats!