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Song Parodies -> "The Ballad Of Henry VIII"
Original Song Title:
"Greensleeves"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"The Ballad Of Henry VIII"
Parody Written by:
Lucy Branston's Great-Granddaughter
The Lyrics
After my last attempt at parodying Greensleeves, someone kindly suggested it should be longer, and so I came up with this much longer version - a sort of potted history of Henry VIII (after all, he fitted a lot into thirty-eight years on the throne). Because there seem to only be two verses, this parody is designed to begin the tune over again, every second verse.
1509 when young Henry came
To sit on Pa's throne and then start to reign
He took as wife his sister-in-law
Should he have dated a little more?
Kate of Aragon his new wife
Catholic church said they should be joined for life
This Henry surely would have done
Had Catherine had living son
"Twas in the 1520s that
Henry needed to have a son begat
When Anne Boleyn got in family way
He had joy in naming wedding day
Life not simple here of course
To get those two wedded required divorce
Kate not happy with those plans
So Henry threw his toys out the pram
Alas for an fortune was not won
She gave Henry one girl but then no son
King Hal's revenge was really quite mean
Had her beheaded on Tower Green
You will understand of course
With the search for new queen life was quite fraught
Jane Seymour was quite soon picked
She would not copy Anne's flirting tricks
Queen Jane's future - rosy and secure
Brought a princely son through childbirth endured
Her life would have been quite great
Fever killed her off at twenty-eight
Henry set out on new quest
Find new wife from portrait that was best
The lucky girl - Anne of Cleves
But on meeting her - King most displeased
King decreed that any new royal bride
Must be virginal - in that, he'd have pride
He favoured a girl in teens
And this loose maid was named Katherine
But Harry's now middle aged
So for him, young queen's passion far from raged
She used initiative, though
And took up with some young male beaux
So fate to Katherine - not so kind
Should have borne cousin Boleyn's fate in mind
Title taken - quite defrocked
Next morning to the axeman and block
Henry reached wife six then died
New queen Catherine with relief did sigh
In a year she too expired
Bearing husband the fourth's only child
To sit on Pa's throne and then start to reign
He took as wife his sister-in-law
Should he have dated a little more?
Kate of Aragon his new wife
Catholic church said they should be joined for life
This Henry surely would have done
Had Catherine had living son
"Twas in the 1520s that
Henry needed to have a son begat
When Anne Boleyn got in family way
He had joy in naming wedding day
Life not simple here of course
To get those two wedded required divorce
Kate not happy with those plans
So Henry threw his toys out the pram
Alas for an fortune was not won
She gave Henry one girl but then no son
King Hal's revenge was really quite mean
Had her beheaded on Tower Green
You will understand of course
With the search for new queen life was quite fraught
Jane Seymour was quite soon picked
She would not copy Anne's flirting tricks
Queen Jane's future - rosy and secure
Brought a princely son through childbirth endured
Her life would have been quite great
Fever killed her off at twenty-eight
Henry set out on new quest
Find new wife from portrait that was best
The lucky girl - Anne of Cleves
But on meeting her - King most displeased
King decreed that any new royal bride
Must be virginal - in that, he'd have pride
He favoured a girl in teens
And this loose maid was named Katherine
But Harry's now middle aged
So for him, young queen's passion far from raged
She used initiative, though
And took up with some young male beaux
So fate to Katherine - not so kind
Should have borne cousin Boleyn's fate in mind
Title taken - quite defrocked
Next morning to the axeman and block
Henry reached wife six then died
New queen Catherine with relief did sigh
In a year she too expired
Bearing husband the fourth's only child
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Voting Breakdown
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| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 3 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 3 | 5 | 5 |
User Comments
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If this was the way my textbooks where written I would have gotton A's
The pacing had me scratching my head in spots. The history was pretty accurate, though. I'm impressed. BTW, are you aware that TOS was allegedly written by Henry VIII?
This would have been a good entry into Kristof's History event in the Decathlon, LB's GG-D. and I'm amazed by Ravyn's trivial snippet - 555
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