Roman's a robbing bastard,
Everybody knows his name,
Spent £250 million,
And won f**k all, and what a shame!

All of the Chelsea rentboys,
Started writing to complain,
Since the day he fired Mourinho,
They'll never win the league again.

Then one chilly night in May,
Abramovich went home.
You blew a quarter-billion quid,
To build the cockney Real Madrid.

Now you've no f**king chance in Europe,
And your leaking goals in every game.
You've signed more managers than players,
But there's always someone else to blame.

Yes the pitch may be slightly slippy,
And the referee may be half blind,
But remember we're pride of England,
And you'll always be a step behind ...