If Blago got on the witness stand - Waa Hoo! Waa Hoo!
His words would have rung throughtout the land - (Bleep!) You! (Bleep!) You!
His language would have been out of place.
His attitude would have destroyed his case.
What a big disgrace if Blago got on the stand.

He told every single talk show host - I'm game! I'm game!
And all of us heard old Blago boast - I'll clear my name!
But then his attorney said Rod, no luck.
You cannot say three words without saying (Bleep!).
You're a total schmuck! So Blago won't take the stand.

If Blago got up to testify - they'd have a fit.
The trail may have led to the Top Guy - then there'd be (Bleep!)
And if that happened - no ifs, ands, or buts -
Then Rhambo Rahm would have cut off Rod's (Bleep!).
The unkindest cuts if Blago got on the stand.

If Blago had spoke in self defense, we'd say today
His innocence soon would be past-tense. More pay for play!
But now the evidence cannot convict
Because dear old Blago's incredibly slick.
He'll say suck my (BLEEP!) and (Bleep!) your damn witness stand!