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Song Parodies -> "It was a Frighteningly Good Zero"

Original Song Title:

"For He's a Jolly Good Fellow"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"It was a Frighteningly Good Zero"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

It was a frighteningly good Zero
Carrier-borne wooden hero
Nippon pilots with fear? No!
These facts nobody can deny
No pilot that flew in the sky
Even Kamikazes who chose to die
It was a frighteningly good Zero
Jap pilots were far from "yellow"
Terror from high or be-low
'40 to '43 ruled the skies

It was a frighteningly good Zero
'Til the Lightning and Corsair appeared though
Type O no longer feared, so,
US was victorious
Britain was victorious
To Allies the Zero went bust
But others replaced the Zero
Ordered by Hirohito
B-29s were not safe, No!
And the Shinden scared all of us...

Jap jet Kikka surprise drove us nuts!

The Kyushu Shinden was incredible but did not see combat. It was the ultimate replacement for the Zero with a 3200 HP rear pusher, canards, heavy cannon, and speed of over 466 mph! A huge machine with self-sealing tanks. Scared the US airman that inspected them. Same for the surprise German jet tech transfer that led to the Kikka and similar rocket fighters. The Nakajima Karyu was the Japanese Me-262. Under construction when the war ended. Zeros fought from 1939-1945. 11,000 produced of all types. Dominated PTO from 1940-43. Still very hard to kill with experienced pilot in 1945 despite exposed weaknesses of poor climb, poor dive, unsealed tanks that caught fire easily. It retained superior turning, acrobatics, and close range killing. One of the Top 10 of WW2.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

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User Comments

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Patrick - November 05, 2015 - Report this comment
I remember building a model kit of the Kyushu Shinden pusher prop fighter. It was a low quality kit, cost about 29 cents back in the early 1960's. Sometimes it's not the absolute best weapon system that wins, but an adequate one that can be produced in large quantities. When we say "B-17", or "B-29", or "P-38", we are applying a generic name to huge fleets of aircraft. When you say "He.274" or "He.277" you are talking about individual airplanes, some only partially completed, and some merely proposals on paper. I believe the same was true for tanks. German tank designs, armor and guns may have been better on an individual basis than a Sherman or a T-34, but US and Soviet industry could crank out their products in vast numbers.
Rob Arndt - November 05, 2015 - Report this comment
Well, 11,000 Zeros were produced and Germany had 36,000 Bf 109s, 20,000 Fw-190s and only 1433 Me-262s (few hundred He-162s as well). P-51 production was 15,000, P-47 16,000, and P-38 10,000= 41,000 US fighters. Germany produced 57,000. Japan had 11,000 Zeros, plus 17,000 other fighters is 28,000. Britain 20,000 Spits and 14,000 Hurricanes is 34,000 fighters plus 4000 Typhoons and Tempests. In bombers the US led with 18,000 B-24s, 11,000 B-25s, 8600 B-17s, and 5200 B-26, plus 3900 B-29s is 46,700. Germany produced 15,000 Ju-88s, 8500 He-111s, 2000 Do-217s, and 1200 He-177s is 26,700. Lancaster production was 7500 plus 6500 Mosquito's plus another 7000 misc bombers is 21,000. Germany did well with fighters under total bombardment but gave up bombers in favor of V Weapons. Had the V-3 Millipede guns survived attack, London would have received 6000 missiles per hour!!! Germany was busy working on a second atomic bomb project under the SS, radiological weapons, a fuel air bomb, and Firedamp weapon. Nowaks super compression bomb would have taken too long and both sides knew of Tesla's Unified Field Bomb theory. FWIW, Japan's A-bomb main facility was in occupied Korea at Konan and NOT in Tokyo. All official histories of the German and Japanese atomic weapons are falsified and remain highly classified. British and Canadian help with the Manhattan Project is also downplayed or omitted. The numbers provided here are merely rounded and do not account for lesser types so all totals are actually higher on both sides.
J0nathan - November 05, 2015 - Report this comment
g00d very g00d! 5's
Rob Arndt - November 06, 2015 - Report this comment
Thanks guys!
Rob Arndt - November 06, 2015 - Report this comment
Late war it probably was the Nakajima Ki-84 Hyate ( Allied codename Frank) that gave the US the most trouble. Here it is in Allied testing: http://www.warbirdsresourcegroup.org/IJARG/images/ki84-1.jpg
Rob Arndt - November 06, 2015 - Report this comment
Initial Japanese version of the Me-262, the Kikka: http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/041/7/1/preparing_for_the_first_and_last_takeoff_by_tzoli-d5ug1kb.png

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