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Song Parodies -> "Twelve Step Program"
Original Song Title:
"Twelve Days Of Christmas"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"Twelve Step Program"
Parody Written by:
Guy DiRito
The Lyrics
On my first day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
A powerless car battery
On my second day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my third day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my fourth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my fifth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my sixth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my seventh day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my eighth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my ninth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my tenth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my eleventh day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Eleven memos typing
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my twelfth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Twelve chums a coming
Eleven memos typing
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
My program brought to me:
A powerless car battery
On my second day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my third day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my fourth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my fifth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my sixth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my seventh day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my eighth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my ninth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my tenth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my eleventh day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Eleven memos typing
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
On my twelfth day of rebirth,
My program brought to me:
Twelve chums a coming
Eleven memos typing
Ten promise keepings
Nine bills financing
Eight prayers repenting
Seven judgments dimming
Six priests absolving
Five men-tor-ings
Four cliping boards
Three dead ends
Two shrinks with drugs
And a powerless car battery
Your Vote & Comment Counts
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 6 | 4 | 5 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Clever! Wasn't life simpler then?
Clever. 5's
Some find 12 stepping sacred. The only thing sacred to me is life itself and maybe the First Amendment. Beyond that ANYTHING is fair game.
Good job!
Considering that this has been parodied so many times before, good job, especially with pacing.
I agree with 2nz.
Thanks all who voted and commented on this. I sense displeasure by some readers as is indicated with some of the low votes on this song. I assure anyone who thinks I was slamming 12 step programs that this was not the intention of this parody. This author tried to condense each step into a terse line that best described it and paced and rhymed with the original. That was the idea that gave birth to this parody. And I would think that some humor is needed for those who follow and live by these 12 steps. Sometimes humor is all that is left in certain situations.
Sorry...I just don't find it amusing.
Oh man..where's the humor?! I thought it was hilarious! I've been in the 12 step program,well...about 12 times. Noticed all the 1's there Guy-that bites.Here's some 5's-not that it compensates for their attacks-but I for one,go on pacing # 1-it's of utmost importance to me-then humor.You did great on both. TC : )
5,3,5 because it wasn't funny.
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This is view # 2003