Biting yourself, acting like Suarez
Going home, not acting like Luis
William Hague is not biting himself
(Himself)
I think I'll keep that for Hutton if I were you

Going so down, acting like Suarez
It maybe 'Weird' acting like Whittington
It isn't no 'Weird' singing like Hanson
Going home, acting like Suarez

Oh what a silly thing
When you're biting on the premiership
It's come to 8:00
Yes, it's Louis Walsh and his own arse
Yeah, his own arse

Talking around, acting like Suarez
Going home, not acting like Kiedis
Looks a lot like Basil Brush, doesn't he
Stick around, that's him moonlighting
You're around behaving like Suarez

I am from Essex
Where we don't bite no more
Oh, Luis Suarez
What a silly thing you've always done
And oh, don't wanna see that anymore
Keep that vanished