if it weren't for your impurities, none of this would've happened
if the flies weren't here for so many years, I would've been able to control myself
if it weren't for my attention, you would have probably been successful, and if
if it weren't for me, my head would probably be covered in mush

eww-eww, you're getting messy, and
you're getting all intertwined, and
ooh-ooh, don't go killing everybody, or I'll
I'll have to clean out all of this grime

we'll fast forward to a few nights later, when
when no one's there except the both of us
and I will heed the shampoo bottle's guidance
I'll wash my hair clean of this

you're essentially a do-with-fleas, and the smell has started to descend on me, and
you look like a diseased toupee, and one day you'll say you were volumized by me, and
I know you're dependent on me like a dead thing is to a mortician, and
I know you stink up a room like a dead thing would, and I think I'll fight it

eww-eww, you're getting messy, and
you're getting all intertwined, and
ooh-ooh, don't go killing everybody, or I'll
I'll have to clean out all of this grime

well, fast forward to a few nights later, and
and no one's here except the both of us
and I've heeded the shampoo bottle's guidance
I've washed my hair clean of this

what part of my hair's been re-scented and once smelled like feet?
what part of your odor feels defective and tends to plead
for the bottle that says "lather, rinse, repeat"?

just make sure you don't smell again, on me or when I'm with my family
you best keep that stench to yourself, and not upset any of my friends or colleagues
I wish I could hack you away, 'cause having you there always gets me so worried
I might have to wash you again, if I lose control and my friends start to ignore me

eww-eww, you're getting messy, and
you're getting all intertwined, and
ooh-ooh, don't go killing everybody, or I'll
I'll have to clean out all of this grime

we'll fast forward to a few nights later, when
when no one's there except the both of us
and I will heed the shampoo bottle's guidance
I'll wash my hair clean of this

eww-eww, you're getting messy, and
you're getting all intertwined, and
ooh-ooh, don't go killing everybody, or I'll
I'll have to clean out all of this grime

well, fast forward to a few nights later, and
and no one's here except the both of us
and I've heeded the shampoo bottle's guidance
I've washed my hair clean of this