Don't wanna be an idiot Chinaman
One nation under the communists
Live in tiny huts made out of trash and crap
Coming in the night and stealing my kid

Welcome to a new kind of China
One that worships Buddha
Cause Buddha and his teaching are OK
We're not as communist as we used to be
But still quite cause we're Chinese
Can i have some more stale rice please?

The production of fortune cookies
The killing of innocent trees
Has risen with population increase
It's too bad they're all fucking starving

Welcome to the minimum wage
five cents for every seven-hundredth Hot Wheels car
And trust me thats just not OK
Please don't sue us Hot Wheels company
We love your fine stainless steel products
It's just a shame you have to abuse the Chinese

Picking rice until you die in the fields
The crows will eat all of your flesh
Someone will poke your eye balls for jewelry
A nation controlled by Fung Li
His name kind of sounds like Fung Shwee
Now I'm in the mood for some Chinese
Let's Go!
[solo here]

Welcome to this crazy-ass country
With an over bearing population
Where anyone can come and take you child
Limited rights and low food supply
Man those kids are good at Olympics
Just like the Russians