I start with…

Dumplings, a choko pie
I guzzle all the batter when food is fried
No need to dine with the finest wine
Hit the takeaway line

Or-e-os

I’m gobbling edible things
Gaining Fly Buys from the number of wings
Watch me chow down ‘til I empty the plate
With chopsticks, knife and spade

The oil congeals

Where are my feet below?
Chins are piled high, can’t tilt my head low
My fat just rolls on, skin splittin’ as I grow
My waist is enormous

She’s gon-na blowwwww!

I’ll slurp every main and side
I’m really growing wide
My clothes rip apart
Alimentary, so immense I’ll eat exponentially
Supersize me

I fried some lard
My butt grew large
Because I tend
To spend all day at Maccas
I’ll eat cake whole
Then lick the bowl
And my rear end
Is growing even fatter

Munching on local Thai
Each restaurant I visit, I drain them dry
Now they’ve put signs on each Chinese diner
Outlining health facts and

Info cards

A pile of steak on this crockery
Snack and bite on this Porterhouse sloppily
I never eat any sprouts or broccoli
Which is why the cops go

“Binge less, become a herbivore
You shouldn’t eat and gormandize a wild boar
Cut back, your tummy extends
You should try to snack on more

Nut-ri-ents

The crap that you feed inside
Has got you oversized
It strains on your heart
Every KFC, donut bakery and patisserie
Must provide these new

Info cards
With number charts
To recommend
A healthy eating pattern
You have to halt
With too much salt
Try supplements
And veggies on your platter.”

I must adjust, it’s true
But I love to eat Nando’s
How ‘bout this…
I’ll go barf chunks to get more tone
The weight is lost, just spew
After every Oporto’s
No more tits
I’m bony, scrawny, skin and bone

A Pizza Hut
An ice cream cart
A hotdog stand
I vomit up straight after
The toilet bowl
I’ll spew it all
And my rear end
Keeps getting even flatter