I'm seeing the dentist for some tooth surgery
Feeling so nervous, and dreading this service
Don't know what's gonna happen to me
I'm feeling the pressure, not knowing what they'll do
(Oh I shoulda brushed some mo', and I shoulda flossed some mo')
Now I'm shot full of drugs, I can tell it because I drool
(Oh I shoulda flossed some mo', and I shoulda brushed some mo')

I am getting numb, sitting in this chair
I try to talk, say "Baa baa aw air"
And the dental staff, all they want to do
Is drill baby drill and get this job through

So concerned about this dentistry
Once they start drilling I just might lose control
What if we're halfway through and I must pee?
And what if I sneeze, what if I must spew?
(The molar the merrier, the molar the merrier)
All the candy I ate, all the cookies and cake I chewed
(The molar the merrier, the molar the merrier)
And all those popups I ate was more than teeth could take

Now my tongue is numb, I can't feel it there
My lips are fat, much more thick than Chers
This is such a bore, isn't that the tooth
'Cause I know the drill, and they know my roots

Says the doc
He was once a guy called Ray
Hear him talk
Says he changed his name, so now he is a dental ex-Ray

Operations done, cavities repaired
I now can eat ice cream unimpaired
The holes in my head filled with caulk and glue
'Cause my HMO says that that'll do

Now it's not so numb, and it hurts right there
(Shouldn't there be medication for me?)
Need a shot of rum, need to say a prayer
('Cause they told me that's the first one of three)