Song Parodies -> "I'm Toast"

Original Song Title:

"Toast"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"I'm Toast"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Before my uncle Paul passed away, he asked that I share one last song with you. Time spent sharing lyrics with the community on this site was really meaningful to Paul. He even wrote some parodies in homage to other parody writers. Those of you familiar with Paul's songs know that he was a character. He was clever, affable, humorous, and prone to impassioned rants about scumbag politicians. He enjoyed life on his own terms. He had a head for numbers, loved music and sports, and was a bit obsessive with his hobbies: playing Strat-O-Matic Baseball, writing parody songs, and not throwing things away. He wrote a whopping 1,000 parody songs, including his own epitaph, which he asked that I post after he’d passed. Written to Tori Amos’ Toast, it’s called I’m Toast. Despite the tongue-in-cheek title, it’s incredibly sweet and such a beautiful gift to leave for those of us that loved him and appreciated his songs.

My last post on this here site
yes, I have died, but
please don't mourn me
Hope that this will make you smile
So please don't mope
joke, don't cry
Don't be pouting
as I would myself
Wear ye a grin wide
May you grin wide

Called by Death, it was my time
From dust to dust
as dust I'll be returning
Death's a Fate that we all share
We all must pass on
Equal, Death is fair
Whether sinner
or good fellow
You'll be returned, yes
back to the earth

So have a laugh
make a joke
A joke in my honor
I hope you laugh
I beg you in advance
'Cause in my life I did try
with syntax so mangled
Though I'm toast, I tell you "Please don't cry"
Please have a laugh
Tell a joke
a joke in my honor
Cope with a laugh
don't look at life askance
At my request please do try
my demise to handle
with a joke - I'm hoping you can smile
do not feel low
Now I go...

Parts of me will still remain
words to remind you
as I am departing
our works will be here
Shalom, it's time to go now...
(Good-bye...)

You can hear Paul singing 'I'm Toast' here on SoundCloud.

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Jeff Reuben - August 12, 2020 - Report this comment

I'm very sorry for your loss. I remember Paul from back in amiright's hayday. He was a talented funny guy (and I had no idea we shared an interest in Strat-O-Matic. Thank you for posting this for him, I enjoyed reading his work one last time.

Claude Prez - August 13, 2020 - Report this comment

Wow. Yeah, what Jeff said. I've always said AmiRight is the most fun I ever had on the internet. It really felt like a special community and Paul was a big part of that; he definitely had brought that hippie uncle vibe. Also: DKTOS but pretty good work. No "Boob At The Half" but not bad haha

Peter Andersson - August 13, 2020 - Report this comment

RIP - As I remember Paul he was always kind to newbies on this site - a quality not always exercised as well today among the current generation of big posters.

Agrimorfee - August 14, 2020 - Report this comment

I am quite saddened (and Peter is 100% correct that this place is not what it once was). :(( Thank you, unnamed nephew, for seeing that his last message for us could be completed.

Rick Duncan - August 23, 2020 - Report this comment

I met Paul, we were parody buddies. Sorry to hear. We had a fun night in San Jose.

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