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Song Parodies -> "Call Me Maybe (Jerk Edition)"
Original Song Title:
"Call Me Maybe"
Original Performer:
Carly Rae Jepsen
Parody Song Title:
"Call Me Maybe (Jerk Edition)"
Parody Written by:
Blaydeman
The Lyrics
The version of the song a jerk would sing.
Verse 1: I got all dressed for the club
Looking for fun not for love
Then I spied you, you were drunk
And now I know I’m set
I shell out cash for your drinks
And count the times that you wink
Those Cosmos got you I think
And now we’ll enjoy sex!
Hook: Your skin got clammy
Bolt fast, it’s uncanny
I’ll go get the Shammy
I am not your nanny, baby!
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
We had a good time
I’ll call you maybe
It’s hard to think straight
When you’re tipsy
I’ll cut my loses
And call you maybe
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
You were a fun time
I’ll call you maybe
But I’m not here for love
Don’t be hasty
I’ll take your number
And call you maybe
Verse 2: I’ll toss her number, that’s it
Though she had beautiful eyes
Don’t act like it’s a surprise
I do this ev’ry week
I laugh and go out again
See her when I walk in
I tried to exit that’s when she
Got up in my way
Hook: Her stare was holding
Then her eyes start flowing
I know she’ll be blowing
“Where you think you’re going, baby?”
Chorus: Hey, have I met you?
Cuz girl you crazy!
But you’re real sexy
I’ll call you maybe
I try to get by, this hot lady
“You hit and quit me!”
“I’ll punch you, Brady!”
Ow! She punched my nuts
And I feel shaky
But she hits hard for
A chick of 80!
Wow, none the other girls
Every pained me
Give me your number
I’ll call you Katie!
Bridge: Girl came into my life
You were drunk so bad
And it was so rad
You were the best I had
Before you came into my life
I was a huge ass
And you should know that
And I am so, so glad
It’s hard to think I
Was so shady!
Please take my number
And call me maybe
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is flaky
I think I love you
Is that so crazy?
And all the other girls
That have layed me
Don’t hold a candle
To your love baby
Outro: Girl you fell into my life
And I am so glad
So please don’t be mad
Or hit my go-gonads
Girl, you drank into my life
And that is a fact
And you are so bad
Let’s go have babies!
Looking for fun not for love
Then I spied you, you were drunk
And now I know I’m set
I shell out cash for your drinks
And count the times that you wink
Those Cosmos got you I think
And now we’ll enjoy sex!
Hook: Your skin got clammy
Bolt fast, it’s uncanny
I’ll go get the Shammy
I am not your nanny, baby!
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
We had a good time
I’ll call you maybe
It’s hard to think straight
When you’re tipsy
I’ll cut my loses
And call you maybe
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
You were a fun time
I’ll call you maybe
But I’m not here for love
Don’t be hasty
I’ll take your number
And call you maybe
Verse 2: I’ll toss her number, that’s it
Though she had beautiful eyes
Don’t act like it’s a surprise
I do this ev’ry week
I laugh and go out again
See her when I walk in
I tried to exit that’s when she
Got up in my way
Hook: Her stare was holding
Then her eyes start flowing
I know she’ll be blowing
“Where you think you’re going, baby?”
Chorus: Hey, have I met you?
Cuz girl you crazy!
But you’re real sexy
I’ll call you maybe
I try to get by, this hot lady
“You hit and quit me!”
“I’ll punch you, Brady!”
Ow! She punched my nuts
And I feel shaky
But she hits hard for
A chick of 80!
Wow, none the other girls
Every pained me
Give me your number
I’ll call you Katie!
Bridge: Girl came into my life
You were drunk so bad
And it was so rad
You were the best I had
Before you came into my life
I was a huge ass
And you should know that
And I am so, so glad
It’s hard to think I
Was so shady!
Please take my number
And call me maybe
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is flaky
I think I love you
Is that so crazy?
And all the other girls
That have layed me
Don’t hold a candle
To your love baby
Outro: Girl you fell into my life
And I am so glad
So please don’t be mad
Or hit my go-gonads
Girl, you drank into my life
And that is a fact
And you are so bad
Let’s go have babies!
August 18, 2012. Please rate and COMMENT! :)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 10 | 10 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
This was great - loved the 'other side' of the OS, then the turnaround and especially the go-gonads. Good job!
I like a good romance story.
Great original song and I love seeing it turned on it's head. Reminds me of Barney Stinson from "How I Met Your Mother"
SOTM...I loved the idea/story of this, and I love the OS...but pacing got me a couple times. Based upon your scores, I might be the only one...so I probably shouldn't ding you. haha.
(SOTM) As I have said many time before, I'm a sucker for parodies that take the original title and turn it on it's head. Though there were a few typos (loses instead of losses being one of the big ones I noticed), this was a fantastic parody, with a pretty sweet ending. 555!
I love the OS, and I am a huge fan of mis-direction lyrics (she had beautiful EYES). Nice work!
Nice job taking the other side with this song. You worked well flipping the original.
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