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Song Parodies -> "Rancid Pork and Hurl"

Original Song Title:

"California Girls"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Beach Boys

Parody Song Title:

"Rancid Pork and Hurl"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Thanks to Kristof Robertson for giving me the title and chorus for this swinish parody.
Well eat roasts, grill large hips;
A squealing pig is dining fare.
And the southern, curled, crisp, fried skins of pork,
Hamhocks and snout--bristles for hair.

The Midwest farmers slaughter squealing hogs--like Beatty's plight.
And carnivores have an ad slogan for this;
They call it "the other meat, white."

I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl,
I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl,
I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl.

They jest, toast while they sup swine,
And what they don't get is tanned,
Made into French bikinis and balls for the gridiron,
Gloves for your palm--grease your whole hand.

They binge in ground, grated pig worlds--
Those teeny swine tails once curled.
Yeah and they couldn't wait for baked spuds and ham steaks,
Fatback and cutlets in skillets swirled.

I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl,
I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl,
I wish they all would eat rancid pork and hurl.

I wish they call would eat rancid pork and
(Hurl, hurl, hurl; they pig out)
I wish they call would eat rancid pork and
(Hurl, hurl, hurl; they pig out)
I wish they call would eat rancid pork and
(Hurl, hurl, hurl; they pig out)
I wish they call would eat rancid pork and
(Hurl, hurl, hurl; they pig out)

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 1
 
 5   9
 10
 9
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, in spite of the fact that this was very funny and punny...I've gotta give you 5s, haven't I? :-) Thanks for the mention, mate....
Johnny D - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody made me actually physically laugh out loud for real! You hurled a MASTERPIECE here, JB!
John Barry - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof, thanks and thanks for the idea. Thanks, JD!
alvin rhodes - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
disgustingly funny...the title had me laughing before i ever got to the song...5s
Guy - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
I almost pulled a hamstring laughing at this. This could be pig, really pig. Well, I don't want to hog all the comments so I'll leave you with a HAMburger and a side of fives.
Red Ant - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
555 for you, even FRESH and cooked pork sends Red Ant to the toilet........repeatedly. Pork rinds rules though ( if they are fresh ). :)
Bob Gomez, chewing the fat - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
I guess we all know who's in Hog Heaven right now: the Ringmaster of Rinds, the Sultan of Snouts, the Beacon of Bacon, the Porcine Parodist Pork Excellence--JOHN A. BARRY!!! This one was sizzlin' hot.
Dee Range - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Just absolutely awesome. I was watching a Travel Channel barbecue special last night . This would have made a fantastic theme song for it. Super high 5's
John Barry - March 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin, Guy, Red Ant, Bob, Dee.
Michael Pacholek - March 19, 2005 - Report this comment
A five-course meal for you.

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