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Song Parodies -> "When Bowdler Edits"
Original Song Title:
"It's Now or Never"
Original Performer:
Elvis
Parody Song Title:
"When Bowdler Edits"
Parody Written by:
John A. Barry
The Lyrics
Thomas Bowdler (1754-1825) started his depredation by botching Shakespeare with his edition of "The family Shakespeare." He removed "words and expressions that cannot with propriety be read in a family." He also eviscerated Gibbon and the Old Testament. His legacy: He's an eponym for censorship that destroys the original work.
When Bowdler Edits
CHORUS:
When Bowdler edits,
He's so uptight.
A pissant, snarling
At what's not "right."
He harrowed, "King James," so great.
When Bowdler edits,
Lit's laid to waste.
When he first saw "Shrew,"
That's when he deep-ended:
"This is just pap, sir,
I must amend it."
He spent a lifetime
Wrecking works so fine.
He ruined "Lear,"
Ed's 20 years,* he trashed.
CHORUS
They let his swill grow;
Allowed his dumb notions
Let him screw up "Love's. . ."—
Killed its emotion.
He snipped words blindly
Gave us crap that was "kindly."
But in the end,
We laugh at him today.
CHORUS
*Edward Gibbon, one of Bowdler's targets, spent 20 years writing his comprehensive "Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire."
CHORUS:
When Bowdler edits,
He's so uptight.
A pissant, snarling
At what's not "right."
He harrowed, "King James," so great.
When Bowdler edits,
Lit's laid to waste.
When he first saw "Shrew,"
That's when he deep-ended:
"This is just pap, sir,
I must amend it."
He spent a lifetime
Wrecking works so fine.
He ruined "Lear,"
Ed's 20 years,* he trashed.
CHORUS
They let his swill grow;
Allowed his dumb notions
Let him screw up "Love's. . ."—
Killed its emotion.
He snipped words blindly
Gave us crap that was "kindly."
But in the end,
We laugh at him today.
CHORUS
*Edward Gibbon, one of Bowdler's targets, spent 20 years writing his comprehensive "Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire."
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User Comments
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I live in Utah, and they have this chain of video and dvd rental places called "Clean Flicks." These people go in and edit "objectionable" parts of movies, so that people who don't like PG-13 or R ratings can watch them without having their sensibilities threatened. No joke. I cannot begin to tell you how angry this makes me. And your wonderful parody made me think of them. Bravo!
Thanks, Ash. Anger is the fuel of parodies.
By all means this crap should be censored - and BTW, while your at it "Get thee to a nunnery". Heh heh - fine parody and a fresh idea at that.
As long as we're talking about Bowdlerism, let's ask why misheard lyrics are sometimes edited. I have no trouble figuring out what a misheard lyric is if it has "s*** " or "f*** " in it. But some now are baffling me. What I thought was PROBABLY a very funny misheard lyric was recently rendered unclear by "a*** " being placed in it. And I still don't have a clue about what "m***** " means in a misheard lyric I saw it in.
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