Remember back age five
A-fumbling with those corded lines
Fingers mis-leading they be
Just couldn’t grasp that shoelace dance
And always stand askance
And walk a-stumbling, you see

Then sewing cards were plopped into
My awkward little hands
And soon were crinkled too
And yarn I always snarl it all
'Cus plying something loop-ed
Always e-ludes

You could see it in my eyes
That I despised those knots I tried
But erred to tie, badge, for
They kicked me out of Scouts, it’s true
I think I’ll sue
It’s F. Lee Bailey I’ll opt for

I practiced macrame
Entwined those threaded lines astray
And gave new meaning to 'fused’
I muddle 'way Cat’s Crad-
-le too, untidy mess made
As I’m so prone to do

This time I tried
To crochet but to stitch
Is just a bitch
My efforts bite, thank you...
Embroidery, I spoiled it all
Displaying something loop-ed
Always askew

That bondage night
Your tackle turned so red
I scarred your head
With over-tight lasso
I always do en-coil it all
'Cus plying something loop-ed
Always e-ludes
(Loops undo. Velcro? Glue!)