Ah, GIRD (or is it "GERD" for "Gastro Esophageal Reflux Disease" ?) for "Sea BIRDs flying in the sun" !! Great job, Paul, well done.

i found the OS hard to swallow, but this went down easy...5s

"Feel the raw, hot burn of GIRD splashing on my tongue " describes it. Yukkity feeling. 5's

You forgot the riff part. A song like this just has to have riff.

The OS is one of my favorites, so I better not read this more than once - hee hee. :-D

Pretty good, if you acid me...5's

Thanks, folks...coincidentally, I am just about to eat a bowl of chili for lunch now...

This was a good idea and well paced, but how about a little rhyming? Crying/whining/splashing doesn't count because, in the original song, Jimmy Webb rhymed dying/crying/flying (feminine rhyme). If you are claiming that gurgling and hurting and grieve and me are also rhyming pairs, that is very feeble. So your only decent rhyme is churning/burning.

Well, Millard, thanks for looking and giving me your opinion. Personally, I don't think that my rhymes are all that bad here, but that is certainly subject to personal preference and taste and I understand what you are saying. You know, there are a couple of internal rhymes within the lines, although from your criticism of those you mentioned I doubt you would think that much of them either. But I do appreciate the feedback from you.

Well I thought it chucked along fine ;) 5s

I should have known someone would think of it first (like 11 years beforehand). Anyway, some more belated verses ......................... Gavascon, oh Gavascon, I still hear my deep winds blowin'...................... Up the windpipe, stuff's a flowin'...................... I was 51 when I started Gavascon....................... ...................... Gavascon, oh Gavascon, I need you to soothe the lashing...................... In my throat the acid's slashing!...................... I want to run, to run to Gavascon....................... ...................... Sometimes I'm drinking too much water...................... Before bed, it's sloshing like the sea...................... But it is waiting there for me...................... On the bedside table, it's the only one....................... ...................... Gavascon, oh Gavascon, you are what I'm buying...................... No other brands that I am trying...................... Before I take a Quick Eze, or maybe more than one...................... I'd rather Gavascon, oh Gavascon!

Personally I would stick with 'Gaviscon *oh* Gaviscon' to maintain the feel of the original, rather than vary it with 'need', 'bring' and 'where's' which don't really flow well. But it's a great effort.