They are brown, those toast crumbs in the butter
Left the eggshells in the fridge again
Jars left open, the crusty mustard rings
The empty milk jug's sitting there since don't know when

Had me fooled, believed that you knew better
Than to try and flush the paper towels
Curly hairs, why can't you rinse the soap?
TP is upside down and wrong way on the dowel

Walkin' about, underwear is blue, well
I picked you out, makes a wife feel so proud

Then I find that you've tracked in some dog poop (tracked in dog poop)
Used my favorite towel to wipe your shoes (wipe your shoes)
Threw it out, so I would never know
Then scorched a pizza and you drank up all the booze

Walkin' about, dog poop on your shoes, well
I picked you out, makes a wife feel so proud

Then I find that you have brought me flowers (brought me flowers)
You tell me that you love me all the time (all the time)
And I know, you'll never break my heart
No, you're not perfect but I am so glad you're mine

They are brown, those toast crumbs in the butter (in the butter)
They are brown, those toast crumbs in the butter (in the butter)
They are brown, those toast crumbs in the butter (in the butter)
They are brown, those toast crumbs in the butter (in the butter)