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Song Parodies -> "I’ve Grown Accustomed to Her Maize Maze"

Original Song Title:

"I've Grown Accustomed to Her Face"

Original Performer:

My Fair Lady Soundtrack

Parody Song Title:

"I’ve Grown Accustomed to Her Maize Maze"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

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I’ve grown accustomed to her maze—
that’s what I am straying in.
I’ve grown accustomed to the gloom
suffusing this corn “room.”
I roam around,
hoping that’s found
the exit in this food for cows.
I will get out, now that I’m in.
Some tangents make me plangent,
but I know: at length out I will get.
So here I find myself, having once again
to vet
the corridors down which I look.
There is many a choice
inside this maze of maize.

I can’t see an out, but I’ll go on looking still.
It’s not as if I have to contend with door
or windows I can look out of, over the sill.
I’ll find my way, because I’ve been here before.
It must take a great deal of water
to keep all of this corn freshly fed
before it’s taken to “slaughter”
and fed to bovines lying in their bed,
a bed that has been composed of freshly mown hay
pitched to the floor by the farmer with his fork.
Now you would think they’d nosh this provender, but hey!
They’re as spoiled as those pigs that provide the pork.

Corn, Eliza, I’m just a mite full
of this maize maze that’s less than delightful.
But now that I think about it, it is not worth the fight.
You’d think by now I’d have the exit in the bag—
I’m starting to suspect she sneaks out here late at night,
cleverly rearranging some of the walls,
to my carefully laid plans, throwing a curve,
making it much harder for me to get out.

But I’m a most corn-sifting man.
Although it’s true I could, but would
not push my way through the maize and then out trudge. . .
not a corn-shivving man.
So I try to find my way back
to the beginning place; it is there she’s
waiting for me with corn pone
that’s as heavy as a stone.
But if I were near there I’d feel a breeze.

Eventually I’ll find my way
to clear blue sky of day
from these corn rows
favored by crows
and, it goes without saying, cows.
I will get out where I got in.

Not really hateful, this woman—
it’s just that she likes to let
me stray like a rabbit
through this maze she made.

Outlet
is still off, I fear, just a ways,
but I don’t truly care. . .
here inside her maize maze.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   1
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - July 11, 2012 - Report this comment
This parody is corny but I like it-555! And 5s for all your MFL parodies today :)
Meriadoc - July 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Sounds like Eliza is really stalking you...
John Barry - July 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, Rob. Long time, Merry--thanks.
TJC - July 15, 2012 - Report this comment
Quadruply a'maizing!

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