Come n listen to my story bout a man named Ted
One of the rich, had bootlegger for a dad
Then one day he was driving on a bridge
A girl up and died, water colder than a fridge
Chappaquiddick, that is!
Major Cover-up
yesserree

Well the first thing you know, Ted's a senator
Thinks that he knows the best about the war
Said that ole Dubya he ain't nothin but a fool
The world is still a turnin and ole Ted is still a'drool
Sour grapes, that is
Never will be president...

Ol Ted has a mansion, lawdy but it's swank
Let's all forget that a little woman sank
Money is a talkin' and b.s.'n how it walks
Cause Kennedy millions were lying in the vault
Cash, that is!
Greenback dollars
Hush money

Well now it's time to suffer more from Teddy and the clan
His story shows you just glide through rough water when you can
We're all exposed routinely to his gross hypocrisy
He loves to dish out heaps of it, he lacks intregity
Turn the tube on
Catch his speeches
Ya'll enjoy him, you hear?