Dummkopf, dat's Deutsch; so's our boy's
Name that somehow got long "A"
Sound when he transliterates
Boehner for Böhner.

Boehner is "Boner"
("Dunce" ain't cognate of "Dummkopf")
Though each for this guy sounds right
(Like him with, too, false cognate. . .)
Boehner's a boner
(. . .One who can't cogitate, Dub)
Each a bonehead and a fright
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blaß*
[and in Alsace-Lorraine:
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blague**]

He says it "Bayner";
He's got it part
Right, he's a bane; sure
Wish he'd depart.

This bonehead's named Boner;
He tries
This guy
"Bayner" for "Berner."***

Coy-boy-toy-ploy-and-doyen
Of den of dunce denizens,
Let Foley follow young men
Who gave him boners.

Bonehead's named Boehner,
Unfortunate name, it's true.
If I were "Boner,"
I would say "Bayner" too.

"Boner"'d cause sorrow;
Here's "Webster's" stance. . .
Meaning's not narrow:
1. Tool for romance
2. One who bones takes
3. "Clumsy, stupid mistake"
Number 3's Boehner.

Dunce, Dummkopf, dummy, douchebag.


*pale, sallow; keine blasse Ahnung: "not the faintest idea"
**blunder, stupid mistake
**The approximated German pronunciation of Böhner (the ö is transliterated to oe for English purposes), is "ber-ner," with the r in "ber," dropped, sort of New England style. The result sounds like neither "Bayner" nor "Boner." But Boehner looks like "Boner," not "Bayner." (And when's the last time you heard anyone mention a "Hayner" harmonica?) Bohner, without the umlaut, and pronounced "Boner," means floor-polisher.