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Song Parodies -> "Condoleeza Rice"

Original Song Title:

"California Girls"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Beach Boys

Parody Song Title:

"Condoleeza Rice"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Can't believe this hasn't been done already... this is as sung by the newly-re-elected GWB
Well Colin Powell's leaving
He really didn't want to wait
For my inauguration speech
So I need a new Sec of State

Also gone is Donny
Who wanted to bomb Iran
If I'm in a mess, I need someone to say 'Yes'
When I hatch a stupid plan

I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza
I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza
I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza Rice

She'll support my war in Iraq
And any other war I'll fight
I am told it's true she'll vote for Star Wars too
She must like those Jedi Knights

Well, Clinton had his interns
And I know they knelt to please
But with Condi Rice here by my side
I'll bring the whole world to its knees

I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza
I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza
I guess it's gotta be Condoleeza Rice
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.6
Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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martha - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
too funny Phil!
Steve K. - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I can imagine the Jib-Jab-style video, with GWB singing and Dr. Rice herself playing the keyboards (she's classically trained on the piano) and also wielding a light-saber, for your "Star Wars" line. Fun fact: the professor who inspired her to study international politics was a former Czech diplomat named Josef Korbel. You've probably heard of his daughter, Madeleine Albright.
Phil Alexander - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for that, Steve... I didn't know she was so multi-talented, but I should have realized she was a load of old Korbel-ers ;-)
John Jenkins - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody has some clever lines, but I have 2 problems with it. First, do you know something about Don Rumsfeld that we don't know? I don't think that "Donny" is resigning from the Defense Secretary position for the foreseeable future. And, second, it is completely inappropriate to put Dr. Rice in the same verse with Clinton's interns. I know that exaggeration and a certain amount of taking things out of context are part of what makes parodies fun, but linking Dr. Rice and Clinton's interns is too much of a stretch for me.
AFW - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Politically, and parodically, correct
Johnny D - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Wonderful, and the Star Wars/Jedi Knights riff is especially hilarious!
Know 1 can hear you dream - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I'll have to disagree with JJ. That verse was the best part of the song and using a two-way pun to tie together the former president's ambiguous genuflective fast-cumings with the present president's ambitious genuflective short-comings, prejudices or not, is straight out of the true parodist's manual. (Available for a mere 5,55$ in an online electoral voting booth near you).
Phil Alexander - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, JJ, I could pretend that I meant "Don Evans" (it came from this comment from another messageboard: "Colin Powell, Ashcroft, Rod Paige, Don Evans, and I keep reading that Condie Rice and Rumsfeld will probably resign as well"), but I'll have to own up that I was probably getting mixed up with John Ashcroft, who has gone. But as for the tie-in with Clinton's interns: that was an intentional crossover leading to the "bring the whole world to its knees" punchline - I thought that had quite a satirical punch.
alvin rhodes - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
a very funny parody about "kinda sleazy rice"
Ashkicksass - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I LedOL at the "bring the whole world to it's knees" line too!!
Ingeborg S. Nordén - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Well-paced and clever commentary on the president's downsizing spree. Here are 15 blue votes for you!
Meriadoc - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I liked the intern verse. Your parody was funny without being mean spirited, which is something that is harder and harder to achieve among the politically flavoured parodies here these days. Good job!
Michael Pacholek - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
I gotta do a Condi parody. It may not be as good as this, but I gotta do one.
Peregrin - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Funny! Wonder what Rice would make of this? (Not the Cube version!)
MasonR - November 19, 2004 - Report this comment
I hear rice is good for the colon. Oh never mind. Great parody!
Phil Alexander - November 19, 2004 - Report this comment
As in Colon Powell, Mason?

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