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Song Parodies -> "Counterfeit Biden"

Original Song Title:

"Paperback Writer"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"Counterfeit Biden"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

I'd like to thank CML for his inspiration to write this one - every time I saw his Counterfeit Biden song come up in the comments, I always heard it to the tune of Paperback Writer rather than Eleanor Rigby. He has also strengthened my view that the election was not stolen: he has been completely unable to show *anything* that supports his contention that there was fraud.

I remain willing to check up on any actual evidence, if anyone has any. But so far there has only been wild conspiratorial, tin-foil helmet "something must be wrong because my echo chamber says so" claims.
There's a sad and angry Trump-supporting cult
Who are not accepting the last poll result
It's based on some former presidential lies
And they're shouting "Fraud!"
And they're calling Joe a "Counterfeit Biden"
Counterfeit Biden

It's a stupid story of a stupid man
Clinging to a job he doesn't understand
His sons are tweeting 'bout election steal
They're a pair of knobs
And they think that there's a Counterfeit Biden
Counterfeit Biden

Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)

If you really think there was election fraud
Of eight million votes, it couldn't be ignored
There'd be some evidence - no one's that good
At a cover up
So how can he be a Counterfeit Biden?
Counterfeit Biden

If you wanna fight it, let me tell you how:
Another election, four years from now
If you have to riot, you can go to jail
With your cellmate, Don
You can gripe about a Counterfeit Biden
Counterfeit Biden
Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)
Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)
Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)
Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)
Counterfeit Biden (Counterfeit Biden)

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Pacing: 1.2
How Funny: 1.2
Overall Rating: 1.2

Total Votes: 57

Voting Breakdown

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Peter Andersson - February 19, 2021 - Report this comment
Of course there was a steal, but I'm voting 555 anyway, because I judge parodies on their own merits, especially when it comes to old friends coming out of retirement to exercise their talents. That said, the same thing happened in Sweden three years ago; the politically incorrect party, that for twenty years had never gotten less votes than predicted in an election, and were predicted to get 23-25 percent, were on their way to 27 percent when the counting was halted, and when it resumed the numbers were "corrected" to 17 percent and stayed there.
Phil Alexander - February 19, 2021 - Report this comment
Hi Peter, nice to see you too :-) But if you're so sure there was a steal, perhaps you'd be the one who can actually give some evidence that it happened?

Really, either present something or STFU. It gets tiresome hearing so many people so sure that the election was stolen yet completely unable to come up with anything even remotely convincing that shows any kind of election fraud.
CML - February 19, 2021 - Report this comment
Paperback Writer is clearly a better title sub ... The first match made in my mind was "All the lonely people, where do they all come from" and "All the Biden (Zonie) voters, etc". At the end I was just casting about for a serviceable title. I don't know how old you were in the mid-Sixties, but there was a fallow period for the Beatles when "Eleanor" and "Paperback Writer" were the only two hits, so those two songs are really a matched pair in my mind
Peter Andersson - February 20, 2021 - Report this comment
I was gonna leave this be, but with all due respect, if you expect people to STFU because there's no court-able proof then the whole World will be a very confusing place to observe henceforth. The proof is near the same as in that story about Sherlock Holmes where a crime was found because of the dog that DIDN'T bark when it should have. Something must be amiss. I'm also told that pattern recognition of this kind is used to catch computer viruses in similar ways in high stakes tech enviroments, you don't have to find the actual virus in observed data to conclude that it's there - if there's too much or too little observed data going back and/or forth compared to what should, then something is wrong and the result/program can't be trusted.

Can we agree that voter identification safety in the US seems to be abysmal even compared to our own two nations?
Phil Alexander - February 20, 2021 - Report this comment
The thing about Sherlock Holmes is that he is a fictional character who is always right because that's what his author has decided. I'm real life, there are lots of times dogs don't bark, and nothing nefarious has happened.

I would dearly love to know what it is that makes some people so certain that a president with the worst approval rating and lowest popularity of any president seeking a second term then losing that election ... what is it that makes people think that election was stolen? Certainly what CML has put forward is utterly unconvincing: assumptions about bellwether states, and misunderstanding of what a group of attorneys general are willing to stand up in court for.

I've read a bunch of claims for things that "prove" the election was stolen, such as a list of "over 30k names of dead people who voted", a list that took minimal effort to show was a list of names of dead people who shared a name with actual, living voters. That's why I ask what makes you so sure there was a steal, not that I require forensic evidence, but to see whether you are also using erroneous claims as pointers to generate your feeling of election fraud.

Because so far nobody has presented *anything* that implicates let alone proves fraud which stands up to any kind of scrutiny at all. And the fact that everyone seems so loath to do so makes me feel that they don't really believe it either, and are doing their damnedest to avoid confronting something that so profoundly affects the world view they've held for the past few years.
John Dacey - February 20, 2021 - Report this comment
Impressively consistent with the structure of the original song. I especially like the 'clinging to a job' couplet. It concerns me a little that repeating this 𝘀𝘰𝘢𝘯𝘡𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦π˜ͺ𝘡 canard gives it unwarranted exposure, but I guess you were stuck with using the term used in the parody this one answers. All fives.
Our Eyes And Ears - February 22, 2021 - Report this comment
Phil, no one outside your fellow capital seditionist propagandists for this unelected illegal occupation regime believes any of your lies. We've all seen the overwhelming proofs you keep pretending not to see and hear when we present them to you, and we know better than to trust any of your gaslighting over our own senses. Come this Civil War 2.0 you lawless Commie Globalist vermin are fomenting, it's open season on you.
Phil Alexander - February 22, 2021 - Report this comment
You see what I mean? Anonymous cowards claim to have proof, but never actually provide it, instead resorting to threats (and missing something very obvious). Beyond pathetic.
CML - February 22, 2021 - Report this comment
Dont threaten Phil, OEAE, cause he'll just turn it around on you. Gotta bring your A game against Phil, I'll give him that. Besides, you'll definitely need a pretty long barelled weapon against him, seeing as how he lives at least four time zones away from you in England
Phil Alexander - February 24, 2021 - Report this comment
Q, eh? Even though I've written a song for you, I'd not want to engage in a battle of wits with someone so profoundly lacking in weaponry.
Patrick - February 24, 2021 - Report this comment
The courts did not hear the vote fraud cases because that was the job of Congress, a task which was interrupted by whoever launched the January 6 attack. It's sad if the Democrats stole the election through fraud, but that's something they've always done. The scary thought is that a senile old tool like Biden could have been legitimately elected. The laws are being put in place and the new voters being welcomed across the border to assure that a Donald Trump never happens again.
Phil Alexander - February 25, 2021 - Report this comment
Patrick, really? The courts did not hear the vote fraud cases because no lawyer (not even Rudi Giuliani) was willing to present any evidence of fraud to a court. The *only* conclusion to be drawn from this is that the lawyers themselves knew perfectly well that they didn't have any evidence of fraud. Why would it be Congress' job?

You think stealing elections through fraud is something the Democrats have always done? Evidence or STFU. That is a frankly ridiculous claim to be making: in five of the last six elections, they've polled the most votes (yet lost the election in two of those), they've not had control of House or Senate for most of that time (despite outpolling the Republicans by millions - you have a seriously screwed up idea of what consitutes "democracy" over there.. I thought it was bad here, but you guys take the biscuit) - how can a party which gets millions more votes yet doesn't hold power be "stealing elections through fraud"???

However old, senile and as much of a tool as Biden may be, still better than a toxic, narcissistic, feeble-minded yet vindictive moron who after four years in the post still showed that he didn't have a clue what his job actually was. Trump's ignorance and utter stupidity has made the US an international laughing stock - you really want that to continue? Why?

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