Health food, don't take, it’s bad
Taken prolonged can’t make it better
Please: french fries with M.S.G. and some tart
Consult a pie chart, eat steak un-fettered

Health food, tastebuds betrayed
‘Chew plant-based to live life for better...’
They spin it you’ll get a young glowing skin
Counting cal’ries in and making feta

But anytime you need wholegrain/whey food: abstain
Don't tarry now Merle, with sugar, go nuts
For well you know your golden rule: sucrose is cool
In shopping got hurled a dozen donuts

Yum yum yum yom yom, yum yum nom nom

Fried food is golden brown
When washed down with a Coke it’s better (so get one out and pour it in)
Remember your pacemaker to kick start
When at K.F.C., just love those letters!

So get it out and chuck it in, health food: the bin
It tastes just like cardboard it was bought in
And don't you know it tastes like glue, health food, won’t do
Improvement would be to munch lamb shoulder

Yum yum yum yom yom, yum yum nom nom
YEAH!

Health food, don't make me laugh
Bagels, hot dogs and cake are better
Sat-ur-ate - ed fat and grease leach from skin (whoa!)
Then you'll breathe it in, which makes it
Better better better better better better, oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!

Na na na nananana, nannana, health food...

(repeat x number of times, fade)...