You are nails scratching blackboards
The weight that makes my back sore
I hope I've used these metaphors clearly
A book that cannot be read
And a brick upside the head
Those both describe you, met-a-phor-ick-ly

You are the rain on my parade
Fire in the Everglades
You're a joke that isn't funny
You are a candle in my eye
Onions in an apple pie
You're a dog that eats my money

You are a sink with no drain
And a farm where there's no rain
I think I've used those metaphors justly
You are a thorn with no rose
Vomit stains on my best clothes
Compared to you that metaphor's lovely

You are the wind that makes me fall,
And a 4 AM phone call
You're the food that isn't filling
You are the trash no one will take
And a toy that's sure to break
You are oil when it's spilling