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Song Parodies -> "JD Vance, Sycophant"

Original Song Title:

"What's New, Pussycat?"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Tom Jones

Parody Song Title:

"JD Vance, Sycophant"

Parody Written by:

Jeff in Richmond VA

The Lyrics

JD Vance is "Creating Stories" (his words) that are putting people in serious danger. He is running around telling Trumpies that Haitian immigrants are eating people's pets. This was a Facebook rumor proven to be false. Bomb threats, hospitals and schools being threatened over nonsense. Enough!! If someone gets killed, Vance should go to prison.
What's new JD Vance? Oh---uh-oh---
What's new JD Vance? Oh, uh-oh, uh -oh!

Sycophant, sycophant
Trump wants power, but Trump's a coward and so are you
So go and "suck up" to him like a loyal brown-nose
Sycophant, sycophant, sounds like you, yes, it do
You are a freakin' brown nose

What's new JD Vance? Oh---uh-oh---
What's new JD Vance? Oh, uh-oh, uh -oh!

"Eating Cats, Eating Cats!!"
No one's killing them, you sound silly there on Fox News
So go and make up some more of your "eating cat" lies!
Eating pets, eating pets, it's not true, you know it too
You and your "eating pet" lies

What's new JD Vance? Oh---uh-oh---
What's new JD Vance? Oh, uh-oh, uh -oh!

JD Vance, JD Vance
You're delirious and if our theories are all but true
We'll know you're kissing your sweet little Donald Trump's a**

JD Vance, JD Vance, we know you, yes, we do
You and your "eating pets" bull (whoa whoa),
you and your "eating cat" lies (whoa whoa)
You & Donald Trump are "ash---coals". (wink wink)

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Total Votes: 526

Voting Breakdown

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 2   1
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Libby - September 16, 2024 - Report this comment
Losing what to whom, MAGgie?
Libby - September 16, 2024 - Report this comment
I have no rejoinder to the Furo video except that it looks fake as hell. And it doesn't change the truth that JD will continue(as he put it) "to create stories" .
Zen Adam B. - September 16, 2024 - Report this comment
Whenever Conald Skunk's poll numbers drop there's another "assassination" attempt. So staged. Reminds me of 2004: whenever Bush's poll numbers dropped there was a new terror alert. But this time even Dick Cheney has endorsed Kamala; it's all over for Conald Skunk.
Socrates' Surrogate - September 17, 2024 - Report this comment
When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the losers.
8D - September 17, 2024 - Report this comment
It's so hilarious that the maga freaks think they're going to win.
F. Lee Bailey - September 17, 2024 - Report this comment
If Trump and Vance were to sue for libel,and defamation they would need to prove whatever it is they are suing libel and defamtion about was false.
Agrimorfee - September 17, 2024 - Report this comment
Hey, did you know that babylonbee is a satire website?
Jeff in Richmond VA - September 17, 2024 - Report this comment
My biggest fear is that under Trump, sites like this will be shut down...because that's what DICTATORS do.
@Agrimorfee - September 18, 2024 - Report this comment
Of course we know the Babylon Bee is a satire website; and that's one of the very sites the free-speech-hating DemoKKKrats are already trying to shut down for "spreading misinformation" i.e. telling truths (albeit satirically) that contradict their illegitimate authoritarian oligarchy's fraudulent and seditious narratives. Do you deny that we people on President Donald Trump's side are the ones who've been shot at (and sometimes hit) by crazed assassins? And do you deny that the DemoKKKrats are hypocritically declaring us the dangerous ones even though we haven't fired any gunshots at them for any of their murderously hateful eliminationist rhetoric?
Phil Alexander - September 19, 2024 - Report this comment
@MAGA - your "hoaxes" are not hoaxes: one is a completely ambiguous bit of nonsense from the then-President which could easily mean exactly what has been inferred by many people. That he contradicted himself a bunch later is more like an attempt at plausible deniability than "assuming he meant what he actually said is a hoax". The Jan6 brouhaha was violent - pretending it was peaceful, or even a majority peaceful goes against so much of what we actually saw on our TVs as it unfolded. The "what you'd have to believe" section is a list of strawman arguments.

I'm guessing that the whole site is similarly trying to spin reality into something more palatable so people like you can cling on to the delusion of being right. About, well, anything.
Libby - September 19, 2024 - Report this comment
He sure is silly, ain't he?
@Phil - September 19, 2024 - Report this comment
and what do you call peaceful? Smashing shop windows, lighting fireworks and setting waste bins on fire, destroying cars, and throwing things at police? That's what those "Not My President" hypocrites did when Trump was first elected, but to you it's probably ok because they are on your side.
Jeff in Richmond VA - September 19, 2024 - Report this comment
Send Trump back to Butler.......Everybody deserves a second chance.....even "Crooks"......IF YOU GET MY DRIFT.
Phil Alexander - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
@@Phil - this is something I see a *lot* from the Trump-supporting right wing: making up what they think someone else thinks, then castigating them for it. Show me anywhere where I have downplayed rioting, and you might have a point. But, as always, you don't.
Phil Alexander - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
@MAGA - you're simply lying. "Again, your side is clearly the one that has committed all the rioting, arson, insurrection, sedition, treason, and murder over these past four years" - is visibly risible. Especially as I don't have a "side": I'm not in the US, I don't have a horse in your race. I'm as near an unbiased observer as you're going to get. There are *so* many things you assert which are nowhere near reality.

"Facts"? You use this word: I do not think it means what you think it means. Ditto "hoax".
MAGA - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
YOU are one who's simply lying, Phil: one needs only look at anything you've ever posted on this site to see that you are on the free-speech-hating far-left fascists's side, which includes not only the DemoKKKrats here in the U.S., but your free-speech-hating far-left fascist "Labour" Party with its authoritarian globalist oligarch Keir Starmer over there in the U.K. You're about as "unbiased" as they are. As also demonstrated by everything you've ever posted on this site, absolutely NOTHING you've ever asserted has been anywhere near reality.

"Facts": realities that are not subject to opinion, e.g. the fact that J.D. Vance has NEVER had sex with a couch.

"Hoax": an attempt to trick people into believing something preposterous, e.g. the facetious "J.D. Vance had sex with a couch!" rumor you and a great many other far-left fools asserted to me as credulously as you do every other preposterous leftard narrative; I'll bet you still believe the "Hunter Biden's laptop is Russian misinformation" and "assassination attempts on Trump were staged" hoaxes too.
J.D. Vance - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
I am here to report on news that media has not covered yet, and they should be for the good of the American people is that MAGA and their friends gather nightly in Springfield Oh to EAT HAWAIIAN PIZZA. I shall create these stories as needed to make THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA ignore the fact that my party has NO ACTUAL AGENDA.
Phil Alexander - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
@MAGA - your "e.g. the fact that J.D. Vance has NEVER had sex with a couch." - that this was something he really did has *never* been asserted as fact. It has been an ongoing joke *because* everyone knows it's not true (however plausible a rumour it might be). This is exactly the sort of misrepresentation you keep making.

Re Hunter Biden's laptop: no, I don't think it's misinformation. Because unlike you I am able to change my mind when presented with evidence. It was reasonable to start with to assume that is was misinformation: the first mentions of it were from Giuliani's stream of utter bollocks that even you don't repeat as being true. So, yes, everyone thought it was another lie like so many others. However, I'm happy to admit I was wrong when shown to be so. Which is so very, *very* unlike you.

And you are so incredibly, laughably wrong about the Labour party being "far left" - they're closer to centre-right at the moment. See if you can find a left-winger this side of the Atlantic and ask them how left-wing Starmer is :-D

So, if nothing I have ever asserted has been anywhere near reality - show me some proof that I have been wrong. There's over a thousand parodies, and probably many thousands of comments, you should be able to find dozens of examples where you can prove what I've said has been wrong. I bet you won't find any (well, any that aren't based on your pathetically distorted version of reality.. any link that isn't to a MAGA propaganda site will do)
Hey Phil - September 20, 2024 - Report this comment
You notice how MAGA sez "that YOU asserted TO ME"(emphasis mine) where nobody within this circle is trying to convince him of the hoax. Look at that self-delusion, self-justification at work. Just like Trump, The attack on his self-worth, on BELIEFS which is all he has, which is probably what has plagued him his entire life. it's all about HIS feelings and his imagination, not toward any rational reality. Sad, so weird, psychotic quite possibly.
Peter Andersson - September 21, 2024 - Report this comment
Are the stories about lots of migrants in the USA eating pets exaggerated?

Yes!

What about Springfield?

You'll never know for sure if you weren't there.

But she retracted her claims!

Yes, that's what happens when you're a girl and lotsa men online threaten to kill you!

Alright, what about in general, people don't eat pets, do they?

When you live illegally or off the grid you sometimes have to eat what you can get, this is nothing new and has nothing at all to do with the current USA election. When I was young during an especially cold winter some of the local ducks in one of the few open waters disappeared with the passing of a, let's call it travelling band, and grilled remains were found later. Asian restaurangs world wide have been found to use stray dogs, sometimes cats and birds, to make ends meet. Don't get me started on Chinese water market diets, I'm sure y'all remember the narrative explaining in great detail that as the origin of Covid (described as either a right wing or left wing conspiracy depending on what side was in opposition in your particular nation when the diarrhea hit the fan). And there's an Oscar Award winning movie from the 80s called "The Killing Fields" that describes what people had to eat (anything they could find, including bugs on the ground) after the communist takeover of Cambodia.

That sounds insane!

Who said the current eaters were sane? Remember that already back in the 80s when Cubans flooded into Miami that their ranks were stacked because Fidel Castro emptied his country's jails and asylums and sent inmates along with the sane people boating out. Miami became the most crime infested city in the USA for a couple of years. Maduro in Venezuela is doing the same thing right now. The majority of emigrants will always be sane people wanting to live better lives, but if everyone in their home countries were sane to begin with they needn't have come in the first place. And the more sane people that gets out the less there are left to help and take care of the crazies back home, so some of them has to follow, have no choice even if their current regimes doesn't force them over into the USA like communist Maduro is doing to stay afloat himself.
Libby - September 21, 2024 - Report this comment
Ok Grandpa....here, take yer thorazine, yer gonna be fine.
Agrimorfee - September 21, 2024 - Report this comment
Yeah, let's ignore the couple hundred bad actors who actually DID storm inside, vandalized property, pooped on furniture and stalked the halls asking aloud where the congresspersons were, as well as the number who tried to get inside who attacked Capitol police with blunt objects (such as flagpoles with American flags on them) or mace or whatever they happened to have on hand. Compared to hundreds more who DIDNT engage in this behavior...well THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING, DOESNT IT???!! RIGHT??!! NUMBERS DON'T LIE!!
Peter Andersson - September 21, 2024 - Report this comment
No one denying that was some crazy bullsh** - but can someone explain to me like I was 111 years old how those alleged insurrectionist would have ruled America from one single captured building and make everyone else in the entire USA obey them? Not much of an insurrection if all you get to hold is a roof and some walls surrounded by the US Military while the rest of the full USA goes about business as usual, including the new president Joe Biden.

Russia couldn't even control Ukraine back when they had conquered a third of that nation in 2022 (and it's down to about one sixth now, even less if you taking into account that Ukraine have been taking some Russian counties lately and are moving in the direction of Moscow).
CML - September 21, 2024 - Report this comment
Now Peter, if by "moving in the direction of Moscow" you mean that Ukraine has advanced several picofractions of a nanometer in a northwesterly direction in the month of September .. well, OK. Otherwise, it's going to be a disaster. Ukraine got to this point with a brilliant unexpected move that took Russia completely by surprise; made possible by the heavily forested areas of the Sumy and Southern Kursk oblasts .......... But that advantage is gone. Russia knows their whereabouts now. And you can't go on the offensive if the other side has dominance in artillery and in the air. Ukraine has no air defense. In about six weeks, all the trees will have dropped their leaves and there will be no tree cover. So then their choices will be surrender or die
Peter Andersson - September 22, 2024 - Report this comment
Again? That's what Russia thought in the autumn of 2022, and again in 2023, and they were dead wrong, 700 000 dead soldiers wrong by now. And on top of that Ukraine just blew up their biggest ammo depot near Moscow (Google Toropets), 450 km over the border with a home made missile (they hardly even need US long range weapons soon, US weapons industry's gonna go bankrupt with Trump in charge) in an explosion that was BIGGER than the one that leveled half of Beirut a few years ago. And the day after that they did it again to the two ammo depots closest to the one already destroyed. Russian logistics are collapsing since ammo trains now have to go all the way to North Korea for reinforcements.
Phil Alexander - September 22, 2024 - Report this comment
@ Peter When you say:
"But she retracted her claims!

Yes, that's what happens when you're a girl and lotsa men online threaten to kill you!
..you are aware that she retracted her claims because her cat came home? And had done so before Trump raised it in the debate...
..because the cat came back, the very next day.. hmm, has potential



@MAGA - when you say:
"Translation: "Any evidence you present from a link that isn't propaganda from my far-left echo chambers, I will dismiss out of hand as 'MAGA propaganda' and therefore won't have to refute." Nice of you to admit up front that any evidence you can't refute, you'll simply dismiss as propaganda; which is exactly what you did with the overwhelming evidence for the 2020 election thefts at hereistheevidence.com I presented to you. That's why, when I present such links, they're for any spectators who might still be open to persuasion, not for non-persuadable rabidly far-left delusion dwellers like you."
This is simple projection - are you unable to think for yourself? Take the Hunter laptop, for example: as I explained, I changed my mind about it when there was clear evidence it was not made-up. The sorts of places I use for proof do the same thing: if found to be wrong, they admit it. Unlike places like hereistheevidence - they have not removed anything proven to be false; they also have much that is completely unevidenced, pure rumour. It is a propaganda site that is not trying to provide evidence, but to convince people like you (who have never read a single page in detail.. possibly of anything at all) that there is some.

"Now here's a lie that's absurdly easy to refute!"
..funny that you haven't managed to refute it, then. Just spewed some verbal diarrhoea that proves nothing.

"Translation: "Ask any of my fellow far-left shills""
er.. the far left over here call me right-wing, occasionally fascist, because I apply the same logic to them as I do to you. Again, you're making ridiculous, unevidenced assertions that do not hold up to easily-seen reality.

"Also, I didn't actually READ that debunking; since I can dismiss americandebunk.com as a MAGA propaganda site, I don't have to, remember?""
er.. the only reason I dismissed americandebunk.com as a MAGA propaganda site was *because* I read what was on it. I'm not like you: I don't do knee-jerk "it's the other side so it can be dismissed". I check first. And the two pages you linked to were obvious ignoring of reality.. so not surprising you think it's a truthful site, it tells you what you want to hear.

When you have a source (such as Guiliani or Trump in the run-up to the 2020 election) who has produced scores, probably hundreds of things fully debunked, the reasonable assumption will be that the n+1th claim will also be lies. You should be angry with them for crying wolf so very many times that nobody believed them. Your problem is you have zero critical thinking faculties, and project your own inability onto others.
Peter Andersson - September 22, 2024 - Report this comment
@ Phil Alexander: Good morning, I'm off to work shortly so this is just from the top of my head - cats coming back make me think of Stephen King's "Pet Sematary" and The Ramones had a hit with that exact name plus an earworming chorus, so one could start something like

I'm not gonna be eatin', until Trump has been beaten
I don't want to see him worm my friends
I'm not gonna eat pitbulls, long as Trump is of sh*t full
I don't want to see him term again

Not sure term should be used as a verb like that, but seems to work.
Hey Peter, it's Aggy - September 23, 2024 - Report this comment
It is quite clear that the Jan 6 rioters could not have done anything fruitful--they could have brought serious injury or death to elected officials at the very most before someone in charge would have blown them away. The issue at hand, believe it or not, is that some on the right are attempting to paint a picture that the rioters were genial, a bit enthusiastic but certainly not out to injure people and overthrow the establishment. FOX News' Tucker Carlson even built one of his "newscasts" to millions of the gullible by cherrypicking available footage of Jan 6 folks' walking around the Capitol like slow monkeys to laughably claim as such.

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