I saw my problems when it starts to burst
I'm losing feeling now, and then it's starting to hurt
There's still a danger we could go too far
Start lubricating now, then we can try a cigar
Grease is the word

It's true our love is just a growin' pain
But with some vaseline, maybe I'll try again
It slips on, sliding it's a smoothie feel
But it's a bit late now - will it help it to heal?
Grease is the word

(Grease is the word, is the third lemon curd)
In the groove, it helps feeling
Grease right on time, in the place, helps the motion
Grease stops the wrong bits from peeling

We're under pressure to go hide away
A little privacy - don't want to cause affray
There is a chance that we can make it for real
Apply the lubricant before it starts to congeal
Grease is the word

(Grease is the word, not a bird, or a turd)
It's got lube, it's not friction
Grease is on mine, on the place like a lotion
Grease eases out the constriction

This is a lifetime of friction, a lifetime of holes
Mixed with constriction - what're we doin' here?

There's too much pressure - need to make it drop
Any more and she may well go off with a pop
There is a chance that I can make a repair
I will start pumping now, put in little more air
Grease is the word

(Grease is the word, Thora Hird it's absurd)
What I buy with my pay checks
Grease down the line a disgraceful emotion
Grease is essential on latex

(Grease is the word, have you heard what occurred)
Goes on smooth, goes on healing
Greasing up mine, with the paste, magic potion
Grease helps the way we are feeling

(Grease is the word, is the word, is the word...)