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Song Parodies -> "Rhine-Stoned Cowboy"

Original Song Title:

"Rhinestone Cowboy"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Glen Campbell

Parody Song Title:

"Rhine-Stoned Cowboy"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I've been walkin' these streets so long,
Spritzin' up, makin' pong.
I've blown every snack I've ingested:
Fries, dogs, hogs, cod, whey.
I'm hurlin' up game from the flame,
Shaved ice, wine, all washed away
As they go down the drain.

There's been a lot o' conch that's risin'
Up my throat, the chunks comprisin'
Brunch, pies, goobers, groats, hare: delights of gastronomy.

I'm a Rhine-stoned cowboy,
'bibin', soused, surly coarse,
Prone to barf, dangle out and go.
I'm a Rhine-stoned cowboy. . .
Ingest carp and retch it
Then sleep with every 'ho' I know. . .
Can't boff 'er--stewed, like me, is my bone.

Well, the bystanders mind the rain
That issues past my facial plane,
Cascades, cakes on their clothing's domain,
Arrayed in an odd way.
And they scream: "This stinks, so do you!"
'cause my Subway hoagie's
Now a dollop stuck on a shined shoe.
And there's a lot of choler risin',
Then some guy my collar's prising,
But just then it blows: detritus of gastronomy.

I'm a Rhined, thrown-chow boy. . .
Primed, his mouth, for discourse;
Now my barf dangles down his throat.
He's a Rhine-choked chow boy. . .
Ingests indirectly
What I'd eaten, and I emote:
"Hey, 'cow' boy, chew my cud!" I intone.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

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Witchita Rhine-man - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
I am particularly fond of this brilliant, chunky-style parody... you really know how to support a running, er, 'gag'.
alvin - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
that was just lovely....lol...i always think of barfing when i think of ol' glen
Stan Hall - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment

"Well, you’re wine-owned now, boy,
tho’ the hard stuff’s better.
'Rummies' cheap ol’ wine’ll leave alone,
scoffers from an old topers’ zone. ..."

"Now, it's the wrong day to tipple Ripple ..."

"Thunderbird suits an old bum like me
just the very thing for the lush I be ..."

5 points apiece for three kneejerk ideas your tune instantly triggers, even tho' I'm unlikely to get 'round to following up a one of'em. :-)
AFW - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
I'm throwing fives right up there...
little-Danube-Cakes - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Barry ( BVD ) = Rhinelander ! Me = Danubie
Jason - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Fantastic rhyming. Excellent. 555
Guy - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
If you bring this up once more you will force me to vote on it and thanks for stealing my comment on Alvin's Supertranp song today. I'm glad my dinner has been down for over an hour before I read this. Yuck. So pukey.

But who am I to point fingers down peoples throats - I once wrote a Beatles Parody "Help" and called it "Ralph" Throw up the lines you think I used. Ralph parodies are fun. Good job on this JB.
John Barry - March 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Wichita, Alvin, Stan, AFW, Cakes, Jason, Guy.

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