Came in for a twelve hour shift
After sleeping for four hours
Lookin' for a cup of coffee
Wanting to smell the flowers

Now she's working in the ICU
She's takin' care to avoid germs
They hang out in mucus membranes
And they're just as gross as worms

Chorus:
Can't you hear them pushing the button
Moaning in pain down the hall
You got pans to the left, shots to the right
And you're the only nurse on call
Oh oh
Oh oh
You got pans to the left, shots to the right
And you're the only nurse on call

She's saving all of these people's lives
But does she get any thanks?
Maybe a thank you from a comatose patient
Hooked up to oxygen tanks

But the money's good no matter how
much pressure she puts up with
She helps people while she learns that yes,
Florence Nightingale is a myth

Chorus:
Can't you hear them pushing the button
Moaning in pain down the hall
You got pans to the left, shots to the right
And you're the only nurse on call

Argued with a doctor
It almost cost her a career
She thought he was so stupid
Giving enemas with beer

But now she feels like a hero
'cause the doctor's been disbarred
She was given a big cash prize by Fleet
Giving an enema can't be hard

Chorus:
Can't you hear them pushing the button
Moaning in pain down the hall
You got pans to the left, shots to the right
And you're the only nurse on call
You got pans to the left, shots to the right
And you're the only nurse on call