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Song Parodies -> "The Designated Driver (Lucille)"

Original Song Title:

"Lucille"

Original Performer:

Kenny Rogers

Parody Song Title:

"The Designated Driver (Lucille)"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

In a bar in Seattle, cocktail ice cubes rattle
Her friends are all toasting with cheers
It's a New Year's Eve party,
The scene's hale and hearty,
But she hides a couple of tears
Had a break with her boyfriend
He found him a new friend
For closure, she's out with her chums..
She'll deal with the sorrow
Another tomorrow,
The jukebox is playing some old song,
She hums..

In the mirror she fusses,
Outside, cars and busses
Are fighting the street and the rain
She hears the loud thunder,
And ponders and wonders,
If her smile is hiding the pain
At half past eleven
She thinks about Kevin,
Soon it's midnight, the New Year arrives
After last call and closin'
Lucille's the one chosen,
'Cause she hasn't been drinking, to drive.


They designated their driver, Lucille
Thought she'd be the safest,
And was good at the wheel..
Her friends had the high times,
With whiskey and rye times,
Now they're lying dead in the field
'Cause she answered her cell phone,
Lucille..

Merged on the freeway, it bordered the seaway
Hard rain made the glaring roads slick
Lucille was cautious, her friends were all nauseous
And paying for good times they'd picked
When she heard the cell ring,
Thought Kevin was calling,
Reached down to take it from her purse
Saw no brake lights flashin'
In a second, came crashin'
Police said they'd seen no wreck worse

They designated their driver, Lucille
Thought she'd be the safest,
And was good at the wheel..
Her friends had the high times,
With whiskey and rye times,
Now everyone's dead in the field
'Cause she answered her cell phone,
Lucille..

Yes, she answered her cell phone,
Lucille...

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   5
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User Comments

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alvin - February 02, 2009 - Report this comment
i love the irony in this
NorCALdriver - February 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Lord L'Air de Farce, The ~ Duke 0'Edge ~ this should be sent to the Texas state legislature, as they are passing a law that outlaws anything, but hands on the wheel only! Makes good sense to me, Sir L'Air !
Andria - February 02, 2009 - Report this comment
As Alvin said, the irony was great, and this parody proves that designated drivers can be just as bad as drunk or high ones. I was personally a designated driver after a party at which large amounts of beer and distilled beverages were consumed, my cell phone rang, I answered it (it was a telemarketer), and the SUV that I was driving swerved into a drainage ditch, but nobody was hurt. Great job, and 5s.
AFW - February 02, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks to alvin, LCC, and Andria

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