Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
Song Parodies -> "Rye Ham, I Said"
Original Song Title:
"I Am, I Said"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Neil Diamond
Parody Song Title:
"Rye Ham, I Said"
Parody Written by:
Airfarcewon
The Lyrics
Deli Klein's serve fine
Most of the time,
Their food is delicious
Owner's Mel, really swell,
What they sell,
It's all kosher in here,
Even the dishes..
Now, I'm not one
To raise a fuss,
Besides and plus
That cute waitress, Emma
But, tell me why
It takes so long?
And this order's wrong,
Such is my dilemma..
Rye Ham, I said
And it's not there
Can no one hear at all?
I bang my chair
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham, said I
My Rye Ham's lost,
And they won't even say why
And this pickle's not dill..
Repeated it twice
Chef should have got it right
Cause my ordering
Was not a lame one
This is white bread on beef
Got this beef, and my grief
My demeanor, my friend's
Not really a tame one..
Now, I've got a hungriness
Deep inside, appetite
Hearing my stomach groan
No, I'm not a man
Who likes to swear,
But, I'll do my share,
If I'm just left sitting alone...
Rye Ham, I said
Rye Ham's not there
Can no one hear at all?
Are they breathing air?
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham, said I
My order's lost
And they won't even say why
And this pickle's not dill...
Rye Ham, I said
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham...
Most of the time,
Their food is delicious
Owner's Mel, really swell,
What they sell,
It's all kosher in here,
Even the dishes..
Now, I'm not one
To raise a fuss,
Besides and plus
That cute waitress, Emma
But, tell me why
It takes so long?
And this order's wrong,
Such is my dilemma..
Rye Ham, I said
And it's not there
Can no one hear at all?
I bang my chair
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham, said I
My Rye Ham's lost,
And they won't even say why
And this pickle's not dill..
Repeated it twice
Chef should have got it right
Cause my ordering
Was not a lame one
This is white bread on beef
Got this beef, and my grief
My demeanor, my friend's
Not really a tame one..
Now, I've got a hungriness
Deep inside, appetite
Hearing my stomach groan
No, I'm not a man
Who likes to swear,
But, I'll do my share,
If I'm just left sitting alone...
Rye Ham, I said
Rye Ham's not there
Can no one hear at all?
Are they breathing air?
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham, said I
My order's lost
And they won't even say why
And this pickle's not dill...
Rye Ham, I said
Rye Ham, I cried
Rye Ham...
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.
Place Your Vote |
Voting Results
| ||||||||||||||||||
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 9 | 9 | 9 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
a passionate plea, if i ever heard one...5s
Well, AFW, as much as I LOATHE this OS I liked this parody...also reminds me of an episode at a "Deli" in Studio City...our family went there for some sort of minor occasion...it said "Deli" on the sign and on the menu and such...but it didn't FEEL like a Deli...but...we sat down...ordered...my Step-Mother, who used to OWN a Deli, ordered her Corned Beef Sandwich - on Rye with just Mustard, of course...and it came with on White Bread with Mayonaisse, lettuce, tomato, and whatever else - oh, I do think they put some mustard on it, too...and she nearly had a stroke...but it wasn't enough for the waitress to take it back and finally get the CB on Rye with just mustard...Step-Mom spent the entire meal obsessing over it, and each time the waitress came by for anything she got another loud and complete earfull about it, too...so it wasn't a great or enjoyable dining experience...Brother Dave finally threatened to walk out if Step-Mom didn't knock off the bitching...which drew icy stares and vibes from Step-Mom...ever wish you were somewhere else? And had a different Family? I did...OH...my soup was OK...not great, but OK...5's here ~ ~ ~
Nice title and execution....555
I keep thinking if this gets recorded folks will think you are saying "Dry ham". Funnier as rye ham. 5's
The very idea of ordering ham in a kosher deli....hilarious! The mental images this brought to mind- an out-of-place goy ordering at the counter...the clerks looking befuddled and conversing among themselves...the guy not having a clue as to why they're not bringing his ham....!! Great! 555
Thanks, Alvin.. Thanks, Paul...good story...and adds validity, here Thanks, Rick C Thanks, Tim...I see what you mean..with rye and dry. Thanks, Chuck
Like Paul I can't stand TOS. That said this is excellent and I can relate with people waiters/waitresses messing up my order.
The sea was angry that day, my friends! Like an old man sending back soup at a deli!
Diamond is one of a parodist's best friends. And this one is no turkey.
Thanks also, to Red Ant and Michael
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
Link To This Page
The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/neildiamond79.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.
This is view # 1339
