i'm in trauma
got a tight throat...coughin' up a finger
with some juices leakin'...what a drag...even had it a nail
think my appetite's gone
cause it sure looks like its more...than a sliver...in scale
and a lawsuit, i'll file today
i hope this diner sees my way
i've got lawyers on my side
when they're done...i will rake in the pay

digits gone...the coppers are huntin' for a victim
the odds are shrinkin'
cause they really don't know just who
spoiled my chowder, you see
left in fear...what were they thinkin' ?
and i just turned pale, its true
i was wonderin' what i'd chewed
i was choked and distraught and a horrid feelin' grew

digit knifed off of a hand fell out while stirrin'
i know that red means blood, son
fingers just ain't for munchin'
and when i first bit...i was shocked...its sawed and runnin'
not a trifle in my eyes
finger cropped...i wonder why
then i saw black...and my face smashed in my pie

sicken me with the chowder served with finger
comfort me, cause my shock could not be bigger
give poor me...a check...with seven figures
a finger 'gainst my tongue...it wasn't even done
dismembered and in my lunch...i sure was sickened