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Song Parodies -> "Nifty Ways To Heave Your Dinner"
Original Song Title:
"Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover"
Original Performer:
Paul Simon
Parody Song Title:
"Nifty Ways To Heave Your Dinner"
Parody Written by:
Dee Range
The Lyrics
Your problem is all outside your belt she said to me
Your pants are rippin' I've got to mend them sur-gic-ly
I'd like to help but you keep bustin' out your Lees
So here's some nifty ways to heave your dinner
She said your belly's really flabby and protrudes
Furthermore she hates to see me in the light, es-pesh-ly nude
Either delete that shelf of the fat and high carb food
Or learn the nifty ways to heave your dinner
Chorus
Just barf it on up, Chuck
Have a good retch, Fletch
You just need to get sick, Rick
Just make yourself heave
Hot vomitus, Gus
You don't need to digest much
Just get on your knees, Lee
Regurge it all free
Repeat chorus
She said just heave it so it flushes down the drain
It was the only thing I could do to make me small again
I said I'll regurgitate that, though I thought it insane
About the nifty ways
She said why don't you just go vomit after sup
And as you heave here's a warning...don't beg me to mop it up
Then she hit me in the stomach and I started to erupt
That's sure a shifty way to heave your dinner
Shifty way to heave your dinner
Repeat chorus twice
Your pants are rippin' I've got to mend them sur-gic-ly
I'd like to help but you keep bustin' out your Lees
So here's some nifty ways to heave your dinner
She said your belly's really flabby and protrudes
Furthermore she hates to see me in the light, es-pesh-ly nude
Either delete that shelf of the fat and high carb food
Or learn the nifty ways to heave your dinner
Chorus
Just barf it on up, Chuck
Have a good retch, Fletch
You just need to get sick, Rick
Just make yourself heave
Hot vomitus, Gus
You don't need to digest much
Just get on your knees, Lee
Regurge it all free
Repeat chorus
She said just heave it so it flushes down the drain
It was the only thing I could do to make me small again
I said I'll regurgitate that, though I thought it insane
About the nifty ways
She said why don't you just go vomit after sup
And as you heave here's a warning...don't beg me to mop it up
Then she hit me in the stomach and I started to erupt
That's sure a shifty way to heave your dinner
Shifty way to heave your dinner
Repeat chorus twice
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 31 | 28 | 30 |
User Comments
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LOL! 555
"Then she hit me in the stomach and I started to erupt
That's sure a shifty way to heave your dinner"
Too funny!
"Then she hit me in the stomach and I started to erupt
That's sure a shifty way to heave your dinner"
Too funny!
A little bit gross...a little more than funny! =) 5s...
555 feathers down the throat.
"Don't need to digest much" is the one that got me!
Sounds like a visit to the Vomitorium.
Hilarious! Five fingers down the gullet, three times.
Thats so gross it's funny.
OK, I'm heaving up 3 five's for you here, Dee. Too bad there's not a good name-rhyme for "Blowing chunks", though...at least I couldn't think of any.
Many thanks to all for the nice comments. I guess somebody(the "ONE" guy?) puked when they read it, though. Hope he had a good day cleaning it up. Looking around the sight today, somebody is on the "ONE" warpath. Doesn't bother me, I'm glad he wastes his time reading things that make him sick LOL
really well written, I like the "you don't need to digest much" line
Royce, thanks, and I really liked your volcano parody today! Since you didn't have comments enabled, just wanted to let you know all 5's from this view!
this is great..especially the chorus and especially especially "hot vomitus, gus"...5s plus
Alvin, many thanks for the kind words
Nice job
Billy, thank you
Have a good ralph, Ralph? Funny stuff.
The parodies of this song just keep getting better! Well done Dee. 555
This is certainly a novel way to send-up "Fifty Ways"; even though I'm not a huge fan of "bodily grossness" songs I'll put that reservation aside and give this the three fives it deserves.
Still laughing! This is what it's all about!
Kristof, Ingeborg, and Joe Melchionne, thank you so much for the nice comments!
(ABC05) Would like a thin mint waffer?
ABC- FUNNY! I like the chorus!
(ABC05) 15 points to raise your av'rage for this vomit fest!
(ABC05) PMFFU! Great job!
(ABC05) I loved the chorus, even though I was getting sick to my stomach. : )
I think you'll score high on this one. But don't treat everyone to a meal.
(ABC) I clicked, I read, I chunkered.
(N) ooh, haven't seen this before - must've been JUST before my arrival here - "It was the only thing I could do to make me small again" was a killer Dee - 555
(ABC) Who woulda thought bulemia would be so funny? Fine work from Ralphing Puke.
(ABC05) Perfectly paced and a riot! High fives.
(ABC) "Hot vomitus, Gus"...ewwww! Hilarious, but...ewwwww! :-)
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