When I wuz a little boy (When he was just a boy)
And my teammates wud call my name (When he was just a boy)
I'd say "A touchdown?"
"Touchdown, easy, no foolin'" (He was a scoring boy)
I'm a rill athletic boy (a real athletic boy)
I'm a scorer on the futball team

Oh, my coaches love me, they love me
They run on the field and hug me
Yes, they love me, I'm a jock!
They love me like a jock with wages
They love me
They love me, love me, love me, love me

Wen I had grown to my full bulk (lookin' like the hulk)
And the pitcher wud throw the ball (lookin' like the hulk)
I'd say "A home run?"
"Home run, easy, no foolin'"(battin' with that bulk)
I'm a muscle-laden man (battin' with that bulk)
And I lyke to play in centerfield

Oh, my coaches love me, they love me
They run on the field and hug me
Yes, they love me, I'm a jock!
They love me like a jock with wages
They love me
They love me, love me, love me, love me

And if I cud read and write (he's illiterate)
I could be reading Dick and Jane (he's illiterate)
I'd say "To be
Or not to be, no foolin'" (but he'd be only foolin'")
I got a third grade reeding skill (he's illiterate)
But I pull down a couple -ten mil a year

Oh, the media loves me, they love me
They come to my house and bug me
Yes, they love me, I'm a jock!
They love me like a jock with wages
They love me
They love me, love me, love me, love me