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Song Parodies -> "Mild Norseman"
Original Song Title:
"Wild Horses"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Rolling Stones
Parody Song Title:
"Mild Norseman"
Parody Written by:
K. Letterman
The Lyrics
Viking living
Was bloody and cruel
The things Leif wanted
Were cultured, subdued
Figure skating
His spins were quite grand
Indulged wine and new shoes
Well-coiffed and tan
Mild Norseman
Baked the best cheese soufflé
Mild, mild Norseman
For desert made sorbet
Swords gave him shudders
And blood made him faint
Ships he would ride in
He thought they looked quaint
Leif had no venom
No battle cries
He’d make guests feel comfy
And serve teas sublime
Mild Norseman
Wouldn’t swing mace in fray
Mild, mild Norseman
Never made bad latte
Leif liked to knit too
The best coats and ties
Yoga brought freedom
And helped clear his mind
Praise words were spoken
When Leif did die
No more fandango
No more pot pies
Mild Norseman
Couldn’t make bad parfait
Mild, mild Norseman
Liked to throw small soirees
Mild Norseman
Not the least bit profane
Mild, mild Norseman
Was truly great Dane
Was bloody and cruel
The things Leif wanted
Were cultured, subdued
Figure skating
His spins were quite grand
Indulged wine and new shoes
Well-coiffed and tan
Mild Norseman
Baked the best cheese soufflé
Mild, mild Norseman
For desert made sorbet
Swords gave him shudders
And blood made him faint
Ships he would ride in
He thought they looked quaint
Leif had no venom
No battle cries
He’d make guests feel comfy
And serve teas sublime
Mild Norseman
Wouldn’t swing mace in fray
Mild, mild Norseman
Never made bad latte
Leif liked to knit too
The best coats and ties
Yoga brought freedom
And helped clear his mind
Praise words were spoken
When Leif did die
No more fandango
No more pot pies
Mild Norseman
Couldn’t make bad parfait
Mild, mild Norseman
Liked to throw small soirees
Mild Norseman
Not the least bit profane
Mild, mild Norseman
Was truly great Dane
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User Comments
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Is this a reference to Leif Ericsson and friends? Christopher Columbus WAS NOT the first outsider to visit the New World. He did bring greed, doom and genocide to the Americas. Leif and Eric the Red and other Norsemen (Vikings) visited North America over 500 years before Columbus and they explored, traded but did not conquer or exploit the Native Americans.
Wrong! Both the Chinese and Phoenicians were there much earlier.
Thanks for the comments.
I was actually referring to Leif's cousin, Leif Motorola. He wasn't as well known as Ericsson. But there is one story that recounts how Leif wasn't always cultured. After a severe blow to the head during a particularly intense backgammon game, Leif's personality changed. He became violent and fought constantly, so much so that his good friend, Ansgar the Wet, handed him over to the police. When the police asked Ansgar why he gave them his friend, Ansgar said "He's so agressive, and has never been that way before. So I'm turning over a new Leif."
I was actually referring to Leif's cousin, Leif Motorola. He wasn't as well known as Ericsson. But there is one story that recounts how Leif wasn't always cultured. After a severe blow to the head during a particularly intense backgammon game, Leif's personality changed. He became violent and fought constantly, so much so that his good friend, Ansgar the Wet, handed him over to the police. When the police asked Ansgar why he gave them his friend, Ansgar said "He's so agressive, and has never been that way before. So I'm turning over a new Leif."
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