Look at Santa
Just another aging hippie
Wanting bud but lighting Christmas trees instead
Big ol' beard and gut
Says it's far out, dude, to see ya
I'd swear *he's* Jer-ry Garcia, but that guy is Dead

And there's
So - much - smoke escaping
From his bag of gifts
Kris Kringle's wasted on the sleigh
So - much - jolly laughter
Tripping through the air
Man, those brownies must have carried him away

Wake up Christmas morn
There's a funky smell that lingers
Someone's scarfed up all the Zingers and the pumpkin pie
There's a scribbled card
Saying Merry Wanna Christmas
When you open up the gifts you'll get a contact high

So - much - time inhaling
Chronic Christmas cheer
Saint Nick is wasted on the sleigh
So - much - double parking
With his air-brushed deer
Bet the Mounties come and carry him away

So - much - scrambled egg nog
Dripping off his beard
San- ta is wasted on the sleigh
So - much - reckless flying
With his stoner deer
Watch the Mounties come and carry him away

Yep, the Mounties came and carried him away