Moskvich...
Hallmark of Soviet car
Won't get you really far
before it breaks down

Moskvich...
lump of the Soviet steel
awful to drive for real -
it's crappiest around

Moskvich is small and ugly and clanky
and the worksmanship leaves desired
It is cramped and unsafe and cranky
in accident it will easily catch fire

Moskvich, Moskvich
Junkyard filler, clunky gear
Blue smoke tells you one is near
Wo-ho-ho-ho-ho, hey!
Moskvich, Moskvich
safety of a cardboard box
That is car that really sucks
wo-ho-ho-ho-ho!

Volga...
Large as an Edsel, sure
safe as a Pinto, true
don't drive on ice!

Volga...
Engine that's oversized
chassis that will capsize
Not very nice.

Nickname of Volga is "Flying coffin"
and that name is real well-deserved
Two hundred klicks per hour you'll go rough in
Losing control won't leave much preserved

Volga, Volga,
Monster of the Party boys
their sons' primary favourite toy
Wo-ho-ho-ho-ho, hey!
Volga, Volga,
all too easy overspeed
Hard to steer and brakes are weak
wo-ho-ho-ho!

Lada...
Beauty from Italy
Soviet technology
Fiat One-Two-Four

Lada...
not really driver's dream
like Soviet submarine
is it's dashboard

Lada grows red rust all so easily
it has not been built to endure
Soviet worksmanship is quite beastly
and its design is not haute couture

Lada, Lada,
It's square box and wheels are round
Watch out for that funny sound
Wo-ho-ho-ho-ho, hey!
Lada, Lada
Drops its parts along the road
In the end you'll need be towed
Wo-ho-ho-ho!