Standing on deck eight, just a red shirt bloke
Couldn't get no dinner, food replicator's broke
Heard a door sliding forth, and Spock entered the scene
Passing by with a plate, with some Vulcan cuisine
He saw one pita, oozing green pâté
With a side of cheese fries, and then Spock walked away

Thought he'd backtrack Spock's steps... through that red sliding door
Didn't know what was in there -- but he knew for sure
That stuffed pita, it came from in there
Didn't get far, it wasn't fair
Just one pita, but to his chagrin
Was the Officer's Mess -- so he couldn't get in
So he started trottin', ain't gonna lose Spock
Yeah he started plottin', but might have to play this one ad-hoc

He's gonna take Spock's gyro (and all his cheese fries), yeah he'll take Spock's gyro
He'll grab one pita, take Spock's gyro, all those cheese fries
Take Spock's gyro (all those cheese fries), He's gonna dine tonight

Heading up to level three, on pretense of some chore
As he followed Spock's shadow, to the turbo-lift door
Through that portal they go, Spock still holding that plate
Has to time it right, seconds left to wait
Makes his grab and he's running, right as lift doors shut
Gotta keep on runnin', yeah Spock can kiss his red shirt butt

'Cause he took Spock's gyro, and all his cheese fries
Yeah he took Spock's gyro, with all those cheese fries
Yeah, took Spock's gyro, all those cheese fries
With that stuffed pita (all those cheese fries)
He's gonna dine, gonna dine tonight...

Yeah, he's gonna keep on scarfin', just can't stop
But he starts a-barfin', because it's Vulcan vegan slop

Well he took Spock's gyro, and all those cheese fries
He just took Spock's gyro, vegetarian surprise
(Just one pita) took Spock's gyro,
He just took Spock's gyro,
Took Spock's gyro, took Spock's gyro
It's not much of a prize -- except the cheese fries...