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Song Parodies -> "Toilet-Trained"
Original Song Title:
"Purple Rain"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Prince
Parody Song Title:
"Toilet-Trained"
Parody Written by:
Andria
The Lyrics
Toilet parody meets love ballad. Non-autobiographical.
I met this dude, met him on a blind date
He was good-looking, far from second-rate
He crapped and pissed himself on our first date
Don’t want to see you until you’re toilet-trained
Toilet-trained? No, he ain’t
Crap his pants? Yes, he does
Piss himself? Yes, he does
I only want to date those guys who’re toilet-trained
I never wanted to be your diaper-changer
I don’t appreciate incontinence
Edwin, I can smell you from a mile
It smells so bad, your fetid effluence
Toilet-trained? No, he ain’t
Crap his pants? Yes, he does
Piss himself? Yes, he does
I only want to date all those dudes who’re toilet-trained
Edwin, I know, you now know
How to use the john, and wipe your own bum too
I think I want to date you
But I can't seem to make up my mind
I think now, I will call you
And let me love you since you’re toilet-trained
Toilet-trained? He is now
Soil his pants? No, he won’t
If you know what I’m thinkin’ about right now,
Let me take your hand
Edwin, please, marry me
I love you, truly love you
And you’re toilet-trained
He was good-looking, far from second-rate
He crapped and pissed himself on our first date
Don’t want to see you until you’re toilet-trained
Toilet-trained? No, he ain’t
Crap his pants? Yes, he does
Piss himself? Yes, he does
I only want to date those guys who’re toilet-trained
I never wanted to be your diaper-changer
I don’t appreciate incontinence
Edwin, I can smell you from a mile
It smells so bad, your fetid effluence
Toilet-trained? No, he ain’t
Crap his pants? Yes, he does
Piss himself? Yes, he does
I only want to date all those dudes who’re toilet-trained
Edwin, I know, you now know
How to use the john, and wipe your own bum too
I think I want to date you
But I can't seem to make up my mind
I think now, I will call you
And let me love you since you’re toilet-trained
Toilet-trained? He is now
Soil his pants? No, he won’t
If you know what I’m thinkin’ about right now,
Let me take your hand
Edwin, please, marry me
I love you, truly love you
And you’re toilet-trained
© 2010, Andria Kilgore. All rights reserved.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 3 | 3 | 3 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 9 | 8 | 8 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Incomparable...and incontinent! ;D
Thanks, OMR, lol.
Every girl needs someone she can DependTM on... ;)
Thanks, Fiddlegirl
Don't get 'pissy" about you date....just kidding!
Funny one, Andria!
Now you're just being spiteful, PI.
Thanks to Mark (lol at the comment), and McKludge (thanks for sticking up for me, as well as v/c)
not bad, kinda funny
Thanks, Phil... always appreciate your comments. A good comment doesn't necessarily have to be a lengthy one like me, Christie, TT or Fiddlegirl write, just as good a comment can be written like yours, short, sweet and to the point. :-)
I'm so "relieved" to hear that that guy was able to relieve himself properly! Hilarious parody and creative use of toilet humor. It's all good! 555.
Thanks, Christie. LOL!
Definitely sounds like the kind of guy a girl should not "Go" with...but glad things worked out in the "End"
Thanks, AFW. I always appreciate your witticisms, great comments and parodies, and your votes. :-)
Urine good company, with all the poo parodies on the site. The only teensy thing better would be different subs in the second chorus.
555, and those stains you see on my pants when I'm near you are *not* from lack of toilet training! ;)
555, and those stains you see on my pants when I'm near you are *not* from lack of toilet training! ;)
Thanks, TT. Very punny and well-written comment there.
With lines like: "He crapped and pissed himself on our first date" this parody was not my cup of tea at all as many people will tell you, I am a Poop Nazi because I can't stand bathroom humor.
Thanks, Matthias... toilet humor isn't to everyone's liking.
Mr. 1s left his signature vote here, and for those who leave all 1s, please tell me why you think the parody deserves them when you vote with 1s.
Mr. 1s left his signature vote here, and for those who leave all 1s, please tell me why you think the parody deserves them when you vote with 1s.
SOTM: With my daughter only a few years removed from toilet training, the title made me laugh. When I read the first verse about your date, I was rolling, brilliant idea. Some of the potty humor may have been over the top but I loved the idea and you had some great lines in here.
Toss that first date my way, he's my type of guy!
I'm not a poonazi (Matthias and I have an ongoing joke about his anti poo issues, he is the Poonazi). . .but I have to be honest in saying that this particular OS didn't give you much to develop your parody. I believe any parody idea can be funny, and have seen toilet humor done very well, this was OK, but this particular Prince song is hard to follow. . .and that kinda hurt your parody, but interesting, demented, idea.. .is that the real poomaster or an imposter, if so, Hi, I haven't seen you in awhile.
SOTM March 2010 - My comment has been placed on the forum voting thread:
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?topic=40307.0
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?topic=40307.0
SOTM- Not bad, I think bathroom humor is (usually) hillarious, but some of the things here were a little much.
Jeff Reuben: Good luck with your daughter, thanks for compliments, vote and comment.
Poomaster: He's not a real person, thanks for v/c, and weren't you banned a while back?
Below Average Dave: Thanks for v/c and constructive criticism. This OS is quite the toughie to parody well, but it's not the most daunting I've done. Those would be my execrable Destiny's Child parodies I started here with way back when and my recent, well-rated UB40 parody.
Peter: Saw your comment on 00s, thanks for vote, comment and constructive criticism.
Abbott: Thanks for v/c.
To all who mentioned the toilet humor being over the top, thank you very much for the constructive criticism. When one looks at all my parodies, particularly those submitted and approved in 2009 and this year, graphic violence, gore and toilet/vomit/bad odor humor run rampant.
Poomaster: He's not a real person, thanks for v/c, and weren't you banned a while back?
Below Average Dave: Thanks for v/c and constructive criticism. This OS is quite the toughie to parody well, but it's not the most daunting I've done. Those would be my execrable Destiny's Child parodies I started here with way back when and my recent, well-rated UB40 parody.
Peter: Saw your comment on 00s, thanks for vote, comment and constructive criticism.
Abbott: Thanks for v/c.
To all who mentioned the toilet humor being over the top, thank you very much for the constructive criticism. When one looks at all my parodies, particularly those submitted and approved in 2009 and this year, graphic violence, gore and toilet/vomit/bad odor humor run rampant.
SOTM...ugh...this grossed me out more than anything, but it's well written, Andria.
Thanks, Arwen... it always means a lot to me to see you comment on my parodies, and I'm sorry I grossed you out. It seems that gross-out parodies are a specialty of mine. :-)
(SOTM) I believe that scatological (I can use big words now!) parodies can be done if done right. This one is a bit repetitive and short, but still good for a chuckle or two. That's good enough for a 555, I think.
Thanks, Conqueror.
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