I couldn't read, since I was eight
I bought a magazine, couldn't get past the date.
I don't know why, I try every day
Because reading's something I really do hate.
I'll try Hooked on Phonics, yes I think

It's a pain when you just can't read,
I will never get a college degree.
One eight-hundred A, B C D E F G
Who would've thought, that it'd work?

So I will admit... I'm afraid to try
I took my textbooks, burned them, said "good-bye."
I need some help really bad, from a teacher to guide
And as I slowly learn, I thought
"Well isn't this nice!"
'Cause I tried Hooked on Phonics... and it worked.

It's a pain when you just can't read,
I will never get a college degree.
One eight-hundred A, B C D E F G
Who would've thought, that it'd work?

Well it's so annoying when, you get silent letters
In the middle of words and then, everything's lookin' right.
And it's so annoying when, you get the "Y" vowel
And you don't know how to pronounce the word
'Cause it's said two different ways...

A novel by Stephen King
Three-hundred ten pages, like that book "Misery."
Or a 10,000 page book when you want something less
But now I did it, I can read
Yes, I have passed the reading test.

'Cause I tried Hooked on Phonics, and it worked!
Yeah, I tried Hooked on Phonics, and it really did work!

It's a pain when you just can't read,
I will never get a college degree.
One eight-hundred A, B C D E F G
Who would've thought, that it'd work?

Well it's so annoying when you get silent letters
And it's so annoying when you get that odd "Y" vowel
That odd "Y" vowel.