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Song Parodies -> "Windows 95"
Original Song Title:
"1985"
Original Performer:
Bowling For Soup
Parody Song Title:
"Windows 95"
Parody Written by:
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd
The Lyrics
Before you upgrade to your free copy of Windows 10, take this parody tour down memory lane, set to an original song that was itself a tour down memory lane, but on a different subject.
A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.
A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.
I am an older chap
I never had an app
One talk show a day
And I feel quite OK
My counties' PC stores
They hate me twenty-four
Just learned the trash can
What the hell's a gaming clan
I don't want no World Of Warcraft
I don't want no Angry Birds
I don't want to follow twitters
I can barely handle Word
My Compaq old PC
Has no card for TV
When you say battery life
That exper-tise is my wife's
It is just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to vinyl, not CDs
On Facebook I'm an absentee
My neighbours have iPads
and blogs about the lunch had
While I have no update drive
I'm into, stick to, Windows 95
(Windows 95)
Might be I'm jurassic
Maybe I'm overtime
Half Life an' Super Smash Bros
I know their command lines
I spent days with Doom
Was a big Duke Nukem fan
Spent two years unplanned
In the castle of Wolfenstein
Where's the paper clip, so persistent
I heard he's offed, he was the first Office Assistant
Wrote this parody, not on XP
Ain't gonna tap into - Vista, Seven
(or the nine point o)
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Minesweep, not Minecraft
I won't forget first Lara Croft
My bitch's now on Facebook
She barks that I should go look
For nothing I'll take a dive
I'm into, down for, Windows 95
Still downing Jolt nonstop
When did that Bill Gates become an altruist
And when did music move to an app store
Please make this stop-stop-stop
And turn back
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Doom 2, not bluetooth
I'll modem from an old phone booth
My toddlers have smarth phones
They're calling me a Flintstone
'Cause I will until pigs fly
Use Windows 95
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Marvel on paper
And three movies Darth Vader's cool
Some colleagues have androids
I'd rather swipe my hemorrhoids
As I'm on blue screen standby
I'm into, hooked on, Windows 95
I never had an app
One talk show a day
And I feel quite OK
My counties' PC stores
They hate me twenty-four
Just learned the trash can
What the hell's a gaming clan
I don't want no World Of Warcraft
I don't want no Angry Birds
I don't want to follow twitters
I can barely handle Word
My Compaq old PC
Has no card for TV
When you say battery life
That exper-tise is my wife's
It is just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to vinyl, not CDs
On Facebook I'm an absentee
My neighbours have iPads
and blogs about the lunch had
While I have no update drive
I'm into, stick to, Windows 95
(Windows 95)
Might be I'm jurassic
Maybe I'm overtime
Half Life an' Super Smash Bros
I know their command lines
I spent days with Doom
Was a big Duke Nukem fan
Spent two years unplanned
In the castle of Wolfenstein
Where's the paper clip, so persistent
I heard he's offed, he was the first Office Assistant
Wrote this parody, not on XP
Ain't gonna tap into - Vista, Seven
(or the nine point o)
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Minesweep, not Minecraft
I won't forget first Lara Croft
My bitch's now on Facebook
She barks that I should go look
For nothing I'll take a dive
I'm into, down for, Windows 95
Still downing Jolt nonstop
When did that Bill Gates become an altruist
And when did music move to an app store
Please make this stop-stop-stop
And turn back
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Doom 2, not bluetooth
I'll modem from an old phone booth
My toddlers have smarth phones
They're calling me a Flintstone
'Cause I will until pigs fly
Use Windows 95
This' just my persona
I am always gonna
Stick to Marvel on paper
And three movies Darth Vader's cool
Some colleagues have androids
I'd rather swipe my hemorrhoids
As I'm on blue screen standby
I'm into, hooked on, Windows 95
© Peter Andersson.
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Voting Breakdown
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| 5 | 11 | 11 | 11 |
User Comments
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This is incredible! Very Retro! Even the song is Retro but I don't think it's from the 90s it was from the Mid-00s.
I really identified with this. I had an ancient Compaq with Windows 98 until just a few years ago and was on dial-up until last year.
My worst was Windows ME. XP just as crappy. 555 bluescreens later...
Thanks for the v/c Matthias, Porfle and Rob - and to Matthias also for setting the record straight about TOS' decade, I guess writing this one got me toooo caught up in the 90s vibe all the way to submitting. :-)
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