-> "Tiger Woods' White Christmas"
Original Song Title:
"White Christmas"
(MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"Tiger Woods' White Christmas"
The Lyrics
The sun is shining,
I'm on the green
My putter puts "putz" in play
My "driver" "hooks" just one way
'Cause only white girls, I lay
Though Cablinasian, I like to say, [1]
I "shoot" at only Caucasian prey
I'm dreaming of such white bliss-ness
Unlike the ones I used to know
Where the pink tips glisten
It's there, I'm kissin'
Ja-net, Leigh-belles; white as snow
Slime: steaming off: non-white "sis", diss
I married Swiss miss, blond and bright
Maid, I pay; she: furi-ous, quite
Elin Nordegren's Christmas turned to blight
[reprise]
Eyes gleaming at their white "business"
Just like two buns of fresh-baked dough
As their "traps" I christen
And do my jissin'
In dear playmates, all aglow
I'm creaming with such white wist-ness
With ev'ry hush-up check I write
"May your lips be cherry and tight"
And may all my mistresses be white
[1] Woods' self-description, a contraction of "CAucasian, BLack, (native american) INdian, and ASIAN.
Actual proportion, delightfully eclectic: Half Asian (1/4 Chinese, 1/4 Thai), 1/4 African-American, 1/8 Native American, and 1/8 Dutch.
(Odd that he goes only for the Dutch type, eh?)
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.6 | |
How Funny: | 4.7 | |
Overall Rating: | 4.6 | |
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Total Votes: | 21 |
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