This was a rush job. I submitted this less than an hour ago, so the explanatory comments are a little sketchy. Most of this parody refers to a famous SNL skit where Christopher Walken plays "legendary" music producer Bruce Dickinson who is working with Blue Oyster Cult to produce the song "Don't Fear the Reaper." Will Ferrell played a hack musician, Bruce Frenkle, who upstages his bandmates by banging on a cowbell -- at the insistence of Bruce Dickinson. The joke here is that there is a cowbell-like sound in the actual song, which most people think is a slightly ludicrous innovation

Well, you're Walken away with 5s from me.

Eh, well, that is some pretty low-hangin' fruit. Wish I'd thought a' that one m'self, actually...

See that you managed to work Coons in there, Len. But we're wise to your ways. Can't wait for your version of White Christmas complete with bedsheets and rope!

In response to your unbelievably uncharitable thumbs up, Rolando, I don't believe that sort of thing would be in keeping with the Christmas spirit ...... But, hey, in honor of the first snowfall to hit Cairo, Egypt in 112 years, how about one of my wacky Islam-based parodies -- I'm dreaming of a white Iftar .. Just like the ones in Aleppo .. Where the head wounds glisten .. and Christians listen .. and fear mayhem in the snow

you really know how to Bing the christmas spirit to amiright Lennie 455

How fun it must have been to write thirty lines of nothing- 1s

Yeah, well, sometimes nothing can be a real cool tune

Great parody, CML-555! Btw, are you going to do a parody about ACA's flawed drug plans that actively deny chronically-ill patients certain drugs or else make them pay up to 50% co-pays? Another flaw in "Affordable" healthcare! Seems Obama and the DEMs passed the worst draft of this just to get something passed. Buyers are finding so many flaws and insurance companies are finding loopholes to recover lost income. Sad indeed :(

This has nothing to do with the parody, but is there a woman out there who would like to be my cyberspace friend, or more? I am a 53-year-old heterosexual male who is currently unemployed and who has been trapped in an overturned pickup for 36 hours somewhere, I think, in Colorado. I was sideswiped by an avalanche of snow. My GPS is out, I ran out of fuel 8 hours ago, the battery is dead, and I don't have much time left on my iPhone. Luckily, my Swiss Army knife is still working and I was able to amputate two frostbitten toes. What's the Vikings-Eagles score? How do you make paragraphs on this stupid thing? For my prospective pen pal: I like long walks on the beach, sitting naked in front of a fireplace, and dining in French restaurants. I just don't want to do these things alone, anymore. There are one...two...three wolves outside the door. I fed them my last Almond Joy. I didn't used to believe in God, but now I'm praying that He hurry up. If I am found and removed to a hospital, I hope I am covered by my new Obamacare insurance because, as I said, I'm out of work (I'm a juggler) and Congress has just cut off my unemployment insurance. Speaking of which, I am circumcized. Merry Christmas!

So cold... so very cold...

Are you done, Adrift? ... Adrift? ....... Getting on to other matters, I thought I should point out that I was ten years off with the line "I gave it back to Butch in '82" If you know anything about American history, the Vietnam POWs were released at the end of the Vietnam War in Nineteen SEVENTY two. I typed in '82 because I was rushing to get the tune in under the wire. On the other hand, my critics, who are ready to nit-pick anything I write for signs of racism, had three days to pick up the error, and didn't. So apparently American history is one subject you people know nothing about --which, come to think of it, does explain many of your comments.

Lennie, you should not have compounded your error. First of all, the Vietnam War ended in 1975 with the fall of Saigon. Second, following the Paris Peace Accords of January 1973, U.S. prisoners of war were returned during Operation Homecoming during February through April 1973. During this period, 591 POWs were released to U.S. authorities; this included a few captured in Laos and released in North Vietnam.
So apparently American history is one subject you know nothing about --which, come to think of it, does explain many of your comments.

Actually CML, there are still thousands of unaccounted for Vietnam POWs (and bodies) that were never returned due to US failure to pay reparations for the "illegal" war. And your dates are still wrong. The ceasfire was Jan 28, 1973 and last military advisors left in March 1973 to which the NVA agreed to swap prisoners within 60 days. The US still supported the South guerilla war through monetary support and covertly through neighbor nations until April 1975 when Saigon fell. The war cost 60,000 US lives and wounded 250,000.

I lived through it too, I lived it. I was a senior in high school in 72-73 and the older brother of one of my best friends was killed when a flight sent to North Viet Nam to pick up some POWs crashed into the South China Sea. He was a crew member on that flight. And yes, that happened in 1973. I also had two older brothers who were in the cross hairs of the military draft and I still recall some fierce arguments they had with my father. I also spent six years at Fort Bragg in the Eighties as an Arabic linguist and Middle East analyst for the 4th Special Operations Command -- hence my knowledge of Arabic and Islam. And during my stint there I talked to a LOT of NCO's who had been in Vietnam ........... The reason I used '72 was to contrast it to '82, which of course was the number that was needed to rhyme with Captain Koons. Besides, the last significant military action of any kind was the Christmas bombing of the North which ended on December 29th of 1972. Linebacker II ended the US involvement in the war ...... So, "I lived it", if you want to claim a gotcha because Hanoi was given four weeks into 1973 to dither around to save face, so be it. But what does that say about people who apparently didn't even know what decade the war ended? And as for whether I know nothing about this period -- perhaps we'll put that proposition to the test a few weeks down the road