-> "Plank for Theocracy"
Original Song Title:
"Thanks for the Memory"
(MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"Plank for Theocracy"
The Lyrics
Plank for theocracy
Is what you might still find, come convention time.
The Panderer who’s Mormon may be the schmuck first in line,
But the runner-up’s
Plank for theocracy
May have to have some room ’cause the man did zoom
In delegates. . .can’t relegate him to get a full broom
Sweep, though runner-up.
Stayed in the race though defeated.
He did not need to be de-fatted
Like Newt, who by then will have scatted. . .
Quixotic run, done from day 1.
That plank for theocracy
Might mean that we’re in store for the days of yore,
Because the man’s a head case who lives for 1604.
He’d blank you so much.
Plank for theocracy
Could make things go to worse—e.g., if you cursed,
You’d have to seek a preacher and confess—your soul to nurse. . .
And no rutting shtups
Without matrimony!
No lingerie or lace—such things have no place
And likewise humps, stiletto pumps. Science—much to erase:
He’d rub out so much.
You’d say “goodbye” to your highball,
Drink bad wine under a steeple.
“Art” would be saccharine and treacle.
No queers, no lust, porn-merchant bust.
This plank for theocracy
With strictures, and beaucoup, planning for the coup.
Though his campaign ran out of steam, he’s still got lots to do. . .
His plank he’ll drum up.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.8 | |
How Funny: | 4.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 4.5 | |
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Total Votes: | 4 |
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