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Song Parodies -> "Trust None To Close Springs (of crude oil)"
Original Song Title:
"Just One Of Those Things"
Original Performer:
Ella Fitzgerald
Parody Song Title:
"Trust None To Close Springs (of crude oil)"
Parody Written by:
Barry J. Mitchel
The Lyrics
On this 77th day after the Deepwater Horizon accident, we still don't know the cause or the cure. I omitted the introduction to TOS, as well as the repeated stanzas.
It was just one of those things:
Cussed, one-off, goes-crazy things; [1]
One of those wells that now and then springs,
Busts one of those rings. [2]
It was just one of those nights, [3]
Thrust under those fabulous lights.
A slip would come soon that tosses and flings
Just all of our things.
If we'd thought a bit 'bout the end of it
When we started drilling far down,
We'd have been aware that our cover there
Was too shot, caught, to pool crown. [4]
So good-bye, eleven men;
We'll cope, bring sealed leak, bow and then
'Twill be State-run; [5]
They us can't trust running closed springs.
Cussed, one-off, goes-crazy things; [1]
One of those wells that now and then springs,
Busts one of those rings. [2]
It was just one of those nights, [3]
Thrust under those fabulous lights.
A slip would come soon that tosses and flings
Just all of our things.
If we'd thought a bit 'bout the end of it
When we started drilling far down,
We'd have been aware that our cover there
Was too shot, caught, to pool crown. [4]
So good-bye, eleven men;
We'll cope, bring sealed leak, bow and then
'Twill be State-run; [5]
They us can't trust running closed springs.
[1] A rare event, first in the Gulf of Mexico since 1979.
[2] ... of steel or concrete surrounding the well.
[3] Blowout occurred at about 10 PM.
[4] Blowout preventer may have been obstructed or had a dead battery.
[5] ... after the 6-month moratorium.
[2] ... of steel or concrete surrounding the well.
[3] Blowout occurred at about 10 PM.
[4] Blowout preventer may have been obstructed or had a dead battery.
[5] ... after the 6-month moratorium.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 3 | 3 | 3 |
User Comments
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Good job, BJM! I regret that Mr. One (a newly-created bureau of the Federal Government overseen by a White House czar) is doing what he does. Be assured I'll resume writing the second that the b*stard drops dead. ;D
BJM - I think we ill run out of oil before we run out of fodder for BP. And that is a good thing. Parodies need to be written daily just to keep on their case for it. Here's a 55 gallon oild drum and a 5 gallon gas can to go with it.
@ OMR - Don't give the one hit oneder any power over you. In fact the best thing to do with these guys is to ignore them. They obviously can't write and get some kind of weird recognition from people commenting about how they oned everyone in one day. I've stated before that votes mean nothing to me. It's the comments that count and the anonymous onester has not the wit to even place anything clever in the comments.
@ OMR - Don't give the one hit oneder any power over you. In fact the best thing to do with these guys is to ignore them. They obviously can't write and get some kind of weird recognition from people commenting about how they oned everyone in one day. I've stated before that votes mean nothing to me. It's the comments that count and the anonymous onester has not the wit to even place anything clever in the comments.
Great job Barry! Drillin ya 5's!
OMR: Thanks; you could be right on the WH connection; I note that to vote 111, you must click the 3 circles on the far left above. ;=)
Guy: Thanks; I second your advice to OMR; he may drop dead before the Oneder, and we'd have missed the OMR wit.
CMM: Thanks; it's a "job" that I love.
Guy: Thanks; I second your advice to OMR; he may drop dead before the Oneder, and we'd have missed the OMR wit.
CMM: Thanks; it's a "job" that I love.
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