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Song Parodies -> "The Walmart Burglary"

Original Song Title:

"Winter Wonderland"

Original Performer:

Felix Bernard

Parody Song Title:

"The Walmart Burglary"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

I was originally writing "Working in a Walmart Underground", but once this idea came up, it seemed to write itself in but a few minutes...
Very soon, and the fun'll
Start - we'll finish the tunnel
Then we'll be inside
The shop we deride
Breaking into Walmart underground

'Cause we won't have to stop for
Anything that we shop for
We'll take what we like
And then take a hike
Breaking into Walmart underground

In the warehouse there's a lot of stock there
Waiting just for us to take away
When the staff come in, they'll have a shock there
At what is missing there come light of day

By the time they've awoken
And they find that we've broken
Into their store
We'll have toys galore
Taken from the Walmart underground

Nick, my little partner,'s hands are shaking
Afraid he's starting off a life of crime
I say: it ain't "theft", call it "stock-taking"
And I'm told companies do that all the time

Their secu-rity's shambolic
So I've turned shopaholic
I takes what I wants
So stuff 'em the chaps
Breaking into Walmart underground

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   8
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User Comments

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Chris Pollman - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
I liked it! 555. Very funny.
Matthias - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice take on "Stock-Taking".... With your parody you stole my heart, my fives, and my wallet!!!
Ann Hammond - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
you'll still have to get through the shoppers
alvin rhodes - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
i like your idea of holiday shopping
Jack Wilson - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Awesome job,555!
TJC - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Funny and clever... your word painting has given me tunnel vision!
John Barry - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
A worthy target.
Michael Pacholek - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Why not rob Wal-Mart? They've been robbing their employees of their diginty, and small towns of their downtown shoppers, for years! And Wal-Mart heir David Glass owns the Kansas City Royals, making him one of the richest team owners in all of sports, yet they're near the bottom of MLB payrolls! He can afford to spend like George Steinbrenner, but he doesn't! And he overcharges on tickets! Go ahead, rob Wal-Mart! I swear, officer, I didn't see him do nothin' wrong! John: Wal-Mart is only worthy of being a target, and Target isn't worthy of much more!
Below Average Dave - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Funny---Good Job, . . .Not really got that Christmas Spirit to it, but I guess that's the Point:)
Yoidy - December 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Funny stuff. Move on up and do the Fort Knox underground! 555
Phil Alexander - December 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, Yoidy, can't deny it
That I might even try it
I'll get a 12-bore, shotgun and C4
For breaking into Fort Knox underground..

That'll get the NSA looking ;-)
BAD - yep, that's the point alright.
Mattias - I like doing crosswords (the cryptic ones), where "stock-taking" nearly always implies cattle rustling. I just thought it fitted quite well :)
Ann - I'm counting on them to help
Thanks for the comments, everyone :-)
Darrell Wilhelm - December 27, 2006 - Report this comment
On one occasion, I was wrongfully targeted for shoplifting at the Delta Oaks (Eugene, Oregon) Wal-Mart for transporting a model kit of an old army jeep out of the store after the dunderhead clerk forgot to ring it up, and the incident is remembered as an example of stupidity by myself and as an embarrassing mistake for both the guard and the clerk. The jeep model ended up looking like a 1943 Willys MB that I see around town regularly. Your parody is funny, but I do not condone any crime in any form.

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