Here’s thug Santa Claus,
Here’s thug Santa Claus—
Rifling’s Santa Claus’ gain.

Filchin’ from kiddies,
Thrashing his reindeer—
They’ve had enough pain.
Belts he’s bringing are quite stinging;
He don’t treat his flock right.
He is socking them in the air
As Santa Claus is in flight.

Deer love Santa Claus,
Deer love Santa. . .
Not! He is their bane.
He calls them “nags” as his whip deploys. . .
Enjoys inflicting pain.
This don’t play well with poor Prancer
And the rest in this plight.
They all dread the fat man in red
Named Santa Claus. . .
Decide they’ll fight.

Deer mug Santa Claus,
Deer thump Santa Claus—
Hooves on Santa Claus rain.
They’ve had their share of being sore;
It’s his turn to be maimed.
Santa’s blows back they are givin’;
They lay on with delight.
Hooves hit hard;
Hear Blitzen jeer
While Rudolph’s nose turns more bright.

Deer bump Santa Claus
Off—slumps Santa Claus,
Slain in Santa Claus’ sleigh.
Won’t come around—
They took him out.
Will Vixen mourn? No way!
Peace and mirth have come to all
The reindeer on Christmas night.
They give thanks, then the porker’s shoved
Out, and it’s hard, ’cause Santa ain’t light.
Falling fast, fat Santa don’t take flight,
Fast they dash off. . .no Santa in sight—
No, Santa Claus ain’t coming tonight.