I am the Don Dark of D.C.
The cool and lofty Greens crave me,
Who praised hard-hittin' rowdy plants;*
And woe to resisters that I muzzle from my manse.#
[And woe to resisters that he muzzles from his manse.]

I followed President Four-Three;
That fool erred often, Dean^ save me!
Whose ways I'd bitten in advance,~
And so do dictators by the dozens ev'ry chance.
[And so do dictators by the dozens ev'ry chance.]

When in rancor I deride
Opposing swells who've lied,
Then I zap my zingers as a showman taunts,
And so do dictators by the dozens in their haunts.
[And so do dictators by the dozens in their haunts.]

When hostile breezes blow,
I never stall or show I'm slow;
Stand, speak the illusion telepromptin' grants,
And so do dictators by the dozens as they prance.
[And so do dictators by the dozens as they prance.]

I foretold that beer with cheese+
Brings oppression to its knees.
The participating men lament, atone for rants,
And know to dismiss slurs and discuss as planned with France.
[And know to dismiss slurs and discuss as planned with France.]