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Song Parodies -> "No Possible Doubt Whatever"

Original Song Title:

"No Possible Doubt Whatever"

Original Performer:

Gilbert and Sullivan (The Gondoliers)

Parody Song Title:

"No Possible Doubt Whatever"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

In the Gondoliers, a baby (the Prince) is stolen and left with a gondolier to raise; by the time they're grown, the said gondolier can't remember which child is his, and which is the prince... so Gilbert and Sullivan write a song called "No Possible Doubt Whatever" which is in effect a song about not being sure of the one important fact. This one's much the same: the one thing we can be sure about in this whole sorry mess is that we do not know, and the current Hutton inquiry ain't going to cast a great deal of light in that direction.
Intelligence reports like these
Were sent upstairs to Tony
To see if Blix et al could seize
Iraqi WMDs
'Cause Saddam's a man you should not appease
There's but one course left, one only

Options weighed, we must invade
We think we're really clever
Of that there is no shadow of doubt
No possible, probable shadow of doubt
No possible doubt whatever

No war-ordaining dossiers came
To George, José or Tony
They all showed pretty much the same
Except for one unsupported claim:
In 45 minutes Iraq could aim
All their weapons: what baloney

You know I'm right, it sounds like shite
The sort they've talked forever
Of that there is no shadow of doubt
No possible, probable shadow of doubt
No possible doubt whatever

Then this pot-pourri it was stirred
By a journalist called Milligan
Who indicated that he'd heard
An MOD source gave him the word
That the Government line, it was quite absurd
But the beans he had to spilligan

His source revealed, his fate was sealed
Despite his best endeavour
Of that there is no shadow of doubt
No possible, probable shadow of doubt
No possible doubt whatever

But Kelly thought he'd have to tell
What he'd writ in his diary
And so he bid the world farewell
His suicide raising quite a smell
But do you think anyone comes out well
From the judicial inquiry?

Who said what they've all forgot
And will they remember? Never!
Of that there is no shadow of doubt
No possible, probable shadow of doubt
No possible doubt whatever

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
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User Comments

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@ssKicker - March 09, 2004 - Report this comment
R0xx0rage. I like muchly. That Tony Blair really is a prat, isn't he?

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